Thursday, June 26, 2003

Bush on 9/11

An upcoming TV-Movie tells the story of George W. Bush on the morning of 9/11 and from all reports, it depicts him as heroic, tough, determined, etc. At one point, it supposedly has him yelling, "If some tinhorn terrorist wants me, tell him to come and get me. I'll be at home...waiting for the bastard." And with that, Bush makes the decision to head back to the White House from Florida. I'm not sure there's one human being on the planet who believes that really happened but that's what they're saying is in the film.

I'm always reticent to critique a movie I haven't seen yet but I sure don't have a good feeling about this one. It's being produced and written by a gentleman named Lionel Chetwynd who some in the TV business still haven't forgiven for his conduct during the 1985 Writers Guild strike. Basically — to condense a long, tortured tale — the '85 strike was about payments to writers for shows and movies that were released on the then-new medium of videocassettes. The Guild had earlier won a very nice deal on this format and the studios wanted to roll it back and lower the formula by which you'd be paid if a show or film you wrote was sold on tape. Mr. Chetwynd was the very vocal leader of a group that called themselves the "Union Blues" and the Blues' position was that a strike on this issue could not possibly be cost-effective; that home video would never be an important source of income and that most writers would never see serious money from tape sales. Still, they insisted, the studios were prepared to keep us out on strike forever if we didn't give in.

The Blues' argument didn't make a lot of sense but then most arguments don't in the imperfect institution we call the Writers Guild of America. In this case, it set everyone to fighting...and then some of our leaders did a spectacular job of muddying the issues and making us look rudderless. We had a short strike that collapsed in great rancor, the producers got what they wanted...and hindsight has certainly proven that the Guild was bonehead stupid to give in as easily as it did. I don't blame Chetwynd completely for this — a lot of people believed what he believed — but I had a few arguments with him in the lobby of strike meetings, and one post-strike encounter in the offices of Orion Pictures. He sure impressed me as being willing to believe whatever he thought would put the most money into his pocket that week.

If the Bush film, which is called DC 9/11, is what current leaks say it is, I doubt even Bush supporters will want to defend it. One bit of evidence that suggests G.W.B. wasn't a heroic man of action that day is this video which is now available on the Internet. It's on a website called The Memory Hole which digs up old news stories and footage that history might otherwise forget.

In the video, Bush is reading a story to children in a Florida classroom. I don't know why that alone is not sufficiently embarrassing. Didn't the man have anything more important to do that day? I think all our presidents waste way too much time and effort on ceremonial matters and silly photo-ops. Anyway, in the tape Chief of Staff Andrew Card gives Bush the news that America is under attack and Bush immediately snaps into action...and does nothing. Let's see how far the Chetwynd version goes to pre-empting this portrait of our Chief Exec.

• Posted at 5:26 PM · LINK

Supreme Court Stuff

One suspects the White House is breathing a sigh of relief today, now that the Supreme Court has struck down anti-sodomy laws. The last thing Mr. Bush needed was to be accused of ushering in a new era of sexual repression.

There will be jokes about this for days in the late night monologues. I haven't figured out any myself but I have the punch line to one: "...and Clarence Thomas dissented but admitted that he likes to watch." Let's tune in Jay, Dave, Conan, Jon, etc. and see how the first part of that one will go.

• Posted at 3:04 PM · LINK

Comic Website of the Day

A lot of folks liked this article that I posted about Redd Foxx. Some of them may enjoy visiting this website that his estate has set up to recall his incredible career. Whatever he was, he was one of a kind.

• Posted at 1:43 AM · LINK

Rock and Roll Is Here To Stay

Watching the hoary programs that Game Show Network broadcasts in the wee small hours, I'm struck by all sorts of realizations. One is that adults in the fifties and early sixties actually thought rock-and-roll music was an annoying fad that would be gone before long. The panelists on What's My Line? (GSN is currently airing shows from 1958) are forever making little parental mutterings about how what "the kids today" listen to isn't really music. The other night, Bennett Cerf congratulated a priest who was moonlighting as a disc jockey for never playing rock-and-roll.

Last week, the panel and host gave short shrift to Jerry Leiber and Mike Stoller, who came on as contestants — and not even celebrity contestants or anonymous contestants. They signed in under their own names even though by then, they'd had a number of hit records. (In case anyone reading this is unaware, Leiber and Stoller were for years the all-time champs when it came to writing Top Ten songs. The list includes "Charlie Brown," "Searchin'," "Ruby Baby," "I Keep Forgetting," "Love Potion No.9," "Neighborhood," "Poison Ivy," "Some Cats Know," "Framed," "Fools Fall In Love," "Love Me," "Riot In Cell Block No. 9," "I Who Have Nothing," "Spanish Harlem," "Stand By Me," "Kansas City," "Smokey Joe's Cafe," "That Is Rock n Roll," "Bossa Nova Baby," "Saved," "Trouble," "Pearl's A Singer," "Young Blood," "Don't," "I'm A Woman," "You Ain't Saying It," "Loving You," "Is That All There Is?," "Yakety Yak," "On Broadway," "Jailhouse Rock," "Little Egypt" and "Hound Dog.")

Elvis had recorded that last one two years earlier but the What's My Line? panel didn't recognize the songwriters' names and treated them like kids working at a burger stand. John Daly even said — thinking he was being nice, I guess — "Well, maybe someday you'll do something serious." Ouch.

Maybe Mr. Daly can be forgiven. No one then could have imagined that Leiber and Stoller — and others of their profession — were doing work that would endure if not forever then certainly through several generations. Recently when I saw a local production of Smokey Joe's Cafe — a revue of Leiber-Stoller material that ran on Broadway for five years — an entire auditorium of adults knew every word to many of the tunes. The fellow who runs the theater came out to introduce the show. To demonstrate the impact of Leiber and Stoller's work, he yelled out, "Yakety Yak" and the whole audience instantly responded with, "Don't talk back!" Bet you couldn't do that with anything John Daly ever thought of.

• Posted at 1:14 AM · LINK

Comic Artist Website of the Day

Another artist profiled in my book Mad Art is the guy who's presently doing Spy Vs. Spy. Peter Kuper draws in a style quite unlike the late Antonio Prohias. Well, to be accurate, Peter doesn't draw the strip. He sprays it. His unique "look" is achieved by sketching the design and then cutting a stencil through which he'll spritz good, old-fashioned spray paint. The technique is visually arresting and as the work you'll see on his website will attest, it has many fascinating applications above and beyond what he does in the pages of Mad Magazine. I really like his work and so will you.

• Posted at 12:18 AM · LINK