Tuesday, October 25, 2005

More Bad News

Elmo, that lovable Muppet from Sesame Street, has been arrested for begging on Hollywood Boulevard.

• Posted at 5:17 PM · LINK

Neuman Shockwaved

Here's a nice little display of all the covers of Mad Magazine in an unusual way. Thanks to Mike Everleth for calling it to my attention.

• Posted at 4:32 PM · LINK

Tuesday Afternoon

Everyone's promising me indictments tomorrow but some are cautioning they may be secret indictments. Okay, fine. I'll settle for secret indictments just so long as we know all about them. I almost can't wait to wake up and find out not only who's been indicted but which side will be calling Patrick Fitzgerald an irresponsible partisan.

• Posted at 4:30 PM · LINK

Indictmentless Tuesday

Sure looks like it. A lot of you have written me to say, "Be not disheartened. Wednesday looks like it'll bring indictments. Or maybe Thursday." Yeah, yeah. That's how it always is. Tomorrow. And then tomorrow, it'll be tomorrow.

Some of you have also written that the indictments, when they come, will be explosive and worth the wait. I think you're missing the point here. I don't care who's indicted or how close they are to Dick Cheney. I just want someone indicted, preferably many someones. The more, the merrier.

I'm giving them until the end of the week. If I don't see some indictments by Friday, I start indicting. In fact, I'll start by indicting all the people who were supposed to issue indictments and let me down. Then I'll go after people I've mentioned on this website. Nathan Lane? I'll indict him. Charles Lane? Indicted. In fact, I may just indict everyone in the country named Lane. Allan Sherman? So what if he's dead? I can still indict him. I'll also be indicting everyone who has never clicked on one of my "give money to the website" banners like this one...

That's right...I can be bribed. And if you think that's wrong, what are you going to do about it? Indict me? Ha!

• Posted at 11:24 AM · LINK

Unbelievable

Nice to know the folks at the White House don't have anything more important to deal with than this.

• Posted at 12:28 AM · LINK