Friday, June 23, 2006

McDonald's Follow-Up

So who are the actors in the McDonald's commercial I posted last night? I asked if the manager was Vern Rowe and several of you (like Eric Tublin and John Nelson) say it's John Wheeler. Marty McKee and Doug Puthoff (and others) seem pretty sure Johnny Haymer — who appeared a few times on M*A*S*H, among other shows — is the guy who sings, "Put a shine on the floor." I've received mixed opinions as to whether the black guy is John Amos. (Tublin thinks it is, Jon Delfin thinks it isn't. I don't think so...but then it still doesn't look like Barney Martin in that raisin bran commercial to me.)

And is that my old pal Bob Ridgely in there, as many people are suggesting? I think so, now that I look at it. He's the guy singing about how clean his burger machine is, and that threw me off. The Ridgely I knew would never sing about cleanliness. Were he alive today, he would have been in The Aristocrats and he would have grossed out everyone in the picture, Bob Saget included.

A couple of folks have asked if that's Anson Williams in there, too. I debated mentioning that because Anson played an employee in at least a couple of McDonald's commercials from this era but I'm not sure he's in this one. I've just sent him an e-mail to ask. Here at news from me, we get to the bottom of the important questions. Never mind the War in Iraq or Global Warming. We want to identify the performers in old commercials.

• Posted at 10:05 AM · LINK

Today's Video Link

In honor of my probably never eating at one again, here's a 1971 commercial for McDonald's that almost everyone who was around at the time will remember. Apparently, the chain did some sort of marketing survey to determine why people who weren't going to McDonald's restaurants weren't going to McDonald's restaurants. They discovered that a lot of people who'd never been in one had the idea that they were just "roadside hamburger stands" and as such were rather grungy and unhealthy.

This reportedly outraged the company head, Ray Kroc, who was obsessive about cleanliness at "his" establishments. Kroc had been a travelling salesguy for restaurant supplies and in that capacity, had visited hundreds of little eateries and been appalled at the condition of their restrooms and kitchens. When he began franchising McDonald's, he went all Felix Unger on everyone and demanded a new level of hygiene. He was known to walk into a McDonald's unannounced, go directly to the restrooms to inspect and if he found anything amiss, he made the manager go in and tidy it up himself.

So the ad boys went to work and came up with this commercial to tell the world that McDonald's were cleaned and recleaned constantly. I believe my old pal Howie Morris directed this. At least, he directed a couple of the commercials in this series, then went on to become the director (sometimes) and a voice (often) in the early McDonaldland commercials. (And hey, is that Vern Rowe as the manager?) Here we go...

• Posted at 1:02 AM · LINK

The Big Four-Oh

For the those of you scoring at home (or even wagering), here's the latest: It's been four weeks since I underwent Gastric Bypass Surgery and so far, I've lost...twenty-eight days!

No, actually, I've lost forty pounds and I still can't get over how good it feels to be rid of them and how little discomfort I've had in the process. There are occasional pains — I think my posture is changing and some muscles are now being taxed in different ways — but there were greater pains and problems involved in carrying around that weight. So far, it looks like a great trade-off.

I also can't quite get over how little I eat or crave. I have not been hungry since the surgery despite a diet that would starve a supermodel. In fact, near the end of the day, I'll sometimes think, "Gee, there was something I meant to do and forgot...what was it? Oh, yes! Eat!" And then I have to force myself to down a protein drink or one of the semi-solid foods I've begun eating. This afternoon, I had a piece of baked halibut about the size of a tin of Altoids, accompanied by a third of a potato knish. And I couldn't have been more stuffed if I'd gone to Hometown Buffet and done a swan dive into the steam tables.

Yes, I seem to have found a protein drink I can live with. Some were too sweet, some too bitter, some too chemical, etc. Many were part of the insidious plot to make me imbibe artificial sweeteners. It finally dawned on me that I could mix protein drinks and get the best of two varieties. I'm now using Healthy 'n' Fit Bodybuilder 100% Whey Pro-Amino, which comes in vanilla or chocolate and which I purchase at my neighborhood Vitamin Shoppe. It's flavored with Stevia and taken by itself, it's tolerable...but I've learned how to improve it. I take a full portion of this, which is alleged to contain 45 grams of protein, and add in just a dash of 40-30-30 Total Balance Drink Mix, a protein drink which also comes in vanilla or chocolate and which they sell at Trader Joe's. The latter contains fructose — too much for me to tolerate a whole drink made out of it — so I use it for flavor. I figure it also adds another 5 grams of protein and fifty grams is around two-thirds of the protein I need for a day.

Still wrestling with doctor and hospital bills...though the burden was lightened by some generous readers of this site who kicked in a lot more than I dared to imagine. I thank each and every one of you, and will be writing personal notes shortly. I've been busy with another means of paying off the docs: Selling my old trousers to Cirque du Soleil. Next time you attend one of their shows, look around as you enter the Grand Chapiteau tent. If you see something that looks like a pocket and it says "Rochester Big and Tall" on it, welcome to my pants. Between that and what I stand to save on groceries and restaurant bills, I could wind up showing a profit on this surgery thing.

But I still have to say: I don't recommend it to everyone. I recommend looking into it if you're in that category that someone charmingly named "morbidly obese" but I'm certain roux en y is not right for some people. I'm just becoming convinced I'm one of the people it is/was right for. My doctor — who I've trusted with my life and would do so again — thinks I oughta do a book about the whole experience, explaining all I've learned, and I just might.

In the meantime, thanks again to all who've sent nice messages and/or PayPal offerings. I'll keep you posted.

• Posted at 12:56 AM · LINK