Monday, November 27, 2006

Please Note —

— as I just did — that I posted a link to an article about how webpages can be an exercise in ego, then posted a long message about how much weight I'd lost. I didn't do that intentionally.

• Posted at 8:47 PM · LINK

Half a Dozen Months

What were you doing six months ago today? Six months ago, I had just undergone Gastric Bypass Surgery. I was being wheeled out of the Recovery Room where the last thing a nurse said to me was something like, "We're all going to miss you around here." Still groggy, I muttered, "I'm going to miss me around here, too," which at the time sounded to me like a clever thing to say. I'm still not sure what it meant or even what I thought it meant at the time.

In those six months, I've lost about 86 pounds...which, added to the 20 or so I'd dropped in the six months prior to that, means I've lost more than some people weigh. Every time I see June Foray now, she says, "Mark, you've lost an entire me!" I'm still shedding about a pound a week — a process my doctor now thinks will continue for another 20-30 weeks before things stabilize. This will put me at the high end of the recommended weight for my height...though if I stayed right where I am today, that would be quite livable. (Hard to believe but even after 65 pounds of Mark had disappeared in the first 65 days, I still came across charts on which my height/weight stats classified me as "Morbidly Obese.")

At the Mid-Ohio Con in Columbus, I answered a lot of the same questions several times. How do you feel? I feel great. What do you eat? Just about anything I want, though I don't want as much and I don't eat as often...and softer, moister foods go down better than tough, dry meals. What was the worst part of the whole thing? The bills. Were you scared? No...not a bit. Maybe I should have been but I wasn't. Is it fun buying all new clothes? Not really. I'm buying pretty cheap stuff because I can't wear it for long before I have to give it away and get something smaller. Would you recommend it to others? Absolutely not.

Well, let me expand on that last one. If I could guarantee that their experience would go as well as mine, yes. But I think I was fortunate in my choice of surgeon, in the presence in my life of a real good general practitioner who gave me a lot of support, and in the fact that — girth aside — I was in pretty good shape before the surgery. I know because this surgeon made me get every kind of examination and physical short of running an Early Pregnancy Test before he'd agree to constrict my innards. Part of my decision came down to realizing that I was going to do it eventually...and now was better than later when things would only have deteriorated.

But no, it's not for everyone and if you're not sure you want to do it, you probably shouldn't. What I will recommend is that if you think you might be a candidate for Gastric Bypass, do a little research...and not just on the Internet. On the web, you can find out what nearby hospital has a department that specializes in the procedure. (What you don't want is a surgeon who'll squeeze one in for you between nose jobs and polyp removal.) Almost all such departments have some sort of orientation and information process, usually involving a free group meeting with a surgeon and maybe a PowerPoint presentation. The one I attended felt a little like they were trying to sell me a time share in Maui but there was some solid information and a chance to ask questions. It also helped me just to see other people who were considering the surgery, if only so I could think, "Well, if that guy can do it, there's no reason I can't." And beyond that, actually making the appointment and going was a first step to taking command of a problem that was too often controlling me. Research on the 'net is great but sometimes, it's a poor substitute for actually doing something.

I should tell you that I'm a big believer in the concept that we're all different in many ways and that a cure (or a religion or a certain restaurant or any of a number of things) that is wholly positive for one person may yield naught but grief for another. When people tell you what worked for them — how they lost weight or quit smoking or broke that annoying habit of midget-tossing — that's fine but that's them. Clearly, ways that others lost weight did not work for me...so mine may not work for you. At the same time, I will add that I think there are some people whose bodies are such that they can no more lose weight via diet and exercise than they can flap their arms and fly to Jupiter. Gastric Bypass Surgery may be a tactic you consider when all else fails...but the reason less drastic methods have failed may not be because you didn't try them hard enough. It may be that your body just plain doesn't work that way.

So I don't recommend doing it but I do recommend that if you need to lose more than the total body weight of June Foray, you at least look into it. If you'd like to read a little more about the last six months of my partial going-away party, I've posted a chart over here.

• Posted at 8:29 PM · LINK

Today's Video Link

Time now for more timeless racial sensitivity with another Superman cartoon produced back when we hated the Japanese. I mean, you kind of know what you're in for with a cartoon called "Japoteurs," right?

This one was released on September 18, 1942. I thought Bud Collyer did Superman's voice but now I think maybe not. However, that's definitely Jack Mercer in there, providing the lines for the main Japoteur. Over and out.

• Posted at 6:34 AM · LINK

November 28, 2006 • Current • November 26, 2006