You'd think that after the Watergate and Whitewater scandals, people would learn the following: That if you're starting a government-related enterprise that might someday get investigated, don't use "water" in its name. The Blackwater company oughta get dumped by the government just for not being smart enough to know that.
Y'know, I'm getting sick of the writing business. Especially with this strike coming, I've been thinking of giving it all up and pursuing my real dream in life which is, of course, to work at my local Chuck E. Cheese restaurant and wear the giant mouse costume. The only thing stopping me is that I'm not sure I know how to do it. How could a person possibly learn the ins and outs of portraying America's favorite pizza-selling rodent? Oh, if only there was a training film I could watch.
As the Writers Guild attempts to negotiate a new contract with the Alliance of Motion Picture and Television Producers, I'm going to report here occasionally on what's happening and I'll attempt to reduce it to simple terms.
The old contract expires October 31 and both sides would dearly love to negotiate a new deal before that happens. So far, what's happened is that the WGA has come forth with a list of proposed increases and new benefits...and the Producers have said, "No, you can't have any of that" and have instead presented a long list of rollbacks and rate cuts that they want us to accept.
The WGA is now asking its members for a Strike Authorization vote that will allow our leaders to call a walkout on October 31 or at any time thereafter if they believe the negotiations have hit an impasse. Ballots are due October 18 and the size of the vote (and the "buzz" within the industry) will presumably have some impact on the bargaining. There will undoubtedly be a sizeable majority voting to authorize but by what margin? And how many members will even return ballots at all? A tepid strike vote will embolden the Producers. A strong vote will add clout to the WGA side.
At this point, there are a number of possible scenarios but the most likely would be one of these two...
1. If the Producers perceive that the resolve is there for a long, serious WGA resistance, there will be enough movement in their offer to keep talks going past October 31. We keep working. They keep talking. I don't think it's possible for the two sides to come to a happy compromise without some grenades being hurled but it's not impossible. More likely, alas, is Scenario #2...
2. Just before Midnight on Contract Expiration Date — perhaps only an hour or two before the old pact expires — the Producers will present what they will term their Absolutely Final Offer. They will tell the press that the business is hurting; that they have gone as far as they can possibly go in an effort to prevent a strike and that the Writers are being unrealistic and reckless to think that they can get another nickel. We will point out that the same studio execs who say there's no more money are elsewhere bragging about record profits and taking home seven, eight and even nine figure annual salaries. And then we'll threaten to strike and they'll threaten to lock us out.
Will there be a strike? I think so, and I don't think it will be a brief one. The Producers are acutely aware that they will have to negotiate next year with the Screen Actors Guild and the Directors Guild, and that any increases won by the WGA will be multiplied by similar concessions to those unions. To the extent they do have to improve terms for the WGA, they'll look for ways to make those gains non-precedential; to configure them in ways that will not benefit the other guilds. But you can only do so much of that. For the most part, the A.M.P.T.P. knows that every dollar they give us means another dollar they'll wind up giving the Directors in some form...and because there are more actors on any project than there are Writers or Directors, it usually means three or four dollars to the Screen Actors Guild.
One small, hopeful sign is that the WGA is taking its Strike Authorization vote before the Producers could present an Absolutely Final Offer. In the past, that sometimes has not happened so the A.M.P.T.P. has drastically underestimated the resolve of the WGA members and has gotten stuck with an Absolutely Final Offer that they (The Producers) later wish had been higher. For both internal reasons — the various employers who comprise the A.M.P.T.P. have to all agree on any offer — and because they don't want to create the precedent of raising offers too much — they have trouble moving off an Absolutely Final Offer. The WGA strike in '88 was as long as it was, in part because the Producers were stuck with a too-low offer out on the table. We all hope they won't make the same mistake again but they probably will.
Personally, I think the whole process is silly and non-constructive, and that they should pitch the whole thing and bring in Howie Mandel and twenty-six models with briefcases...but the game is played the way the game is played, even to the detriment of both sides. So stay tuned.
This is the long-awaited Part Four of my series on how the character Scrappy Doo came to be. Before you read it, you might want to go back and read Part One. You might want to go back and read Part Two. You might even, just to get really current with this, want to go back and read Part Three. But now here's our latest installment...
Okay, so where are we now? Oh, right: We had a script for the first Scrappy episode of the Scooby Doo series. It was an adaptation I'd written, in the grand Hollywood tradition of stealing from one's self, of a story I'd done a few years earlier for the Gold Key Scooby Doo comic book...a story about a comic book artist who is "haunted" by the super-hero he draws. But before it could be recorded, they had to find a voice for Scrappy Doo. Not as simple as you might expect.
For reasons noted, everyone's first thought was to have Mel Blanc play the scrappy one. Mel was contacted. Mel was interested. Mel was too expensive. The great Mr. Blanc did not come cheap and at times, by whatever decision-making process he used to manage his career, he'd suddenly decide to up his price a few notches. One day, Joe Barbera said to me, "We should have no problem getting Mel. He just did Captain Caveman and a couple other jobs for us." The next day, Mr. B. told me, "Forget about Mel."
We forgot about Mel. Auditions were held. Actors tried out. One of the many who read for the role of Scrappy Doo was a gentleman named Frank Welker, who has done more cartoon voices than any three other people in the business combined...and yes, even if one of those three is Mel Blanc. Frank was already a member of the regular Scooby Doo cast, playing the role of Fred. He gave a pretty good audition and during it, he ad-libbed a little bit where Scrappy yelled a few fanfare notes and proclaimed, "Puppy power!"
Joe Barbera thought this was a great little catch-phrase for the character. He recalled how in the audition for the part of Fred Flintstone, actor Alan Reed had ad-libbed the immortal phrase, "Yabba dabba doo!" It didn't sound to me like the same kind of lightning strike but I was told to insert the rallying cry of "Puppy power" into the script. Then, to thank Welker for his brilliant idea, the part of Scrappy Doo was assigned to...Don Messick. Messick, who was also the voice of Scooby, had given the best audition, they decided.
Okay, fine. So Don would play Scooby and Scrappy, and my script was recorded.
Everything fine, right? Nope. A few days later, the folks over at ABC listened to the track and decided that Scrappy had the wrong voice. Talented as Don Messick was, he just wasn't the perfect Scrappy. So they listened to all the other auditions again and I think they even did some more...and they decided that the right voice for Scrappy was one that Daws Butler had done. Everyone concurred so they called in Daws, and they called back all the other actors (including Messick to play Scooby) and they re-recorded the entire script with Daws as Scrappy.
So now they were done, right? Nope again. After the track for that cartoon was edited, they decided that Scrappy still wasn't right. Again, they listened to all the past auditions. Again, they had a few more done. This time, they decided that a lady named Marilyn Schreffler had the perfect sound for Scooby's nephew. So everyone trudged back into the studio and they recorded my script for a third time. That went so well that three days later, they were back doing it again, this time with Frank Welker playing Scrappy.
And then...
Well, around here is where I lost track. I'd go to the studio, walk into the producer's office and say, "Don't tell me...let me guess. Laurence Olivier? Marcel Marceau? Jayne Mansfield?" Scrappy was well on his way to becoming the first network TV cartoon character to have more voices than fans. There was one morning when they told me Paul Winchell had been chosen as the voice of Scrappy and then later, when I came back from lunch, Dick Beals was going to be Scrappy. I don't think Paul or Dick ever recorded because then, Mr. Barbera decided it was time to bite ye olde bullet and see if they could make a deal with Mel Blanc (who hadn't even auditioned) and they spent a few days haggling with him and simultaneously auditioning more actors.
They even went so far as to ask me who I'd cast...and back then at Hanna-Barbera, they had to be pretty desperate before they'd ask a writer anything like that. I had two suggestions, the first being Howie Morris. This was before I worked with Howie on another show and we became close friends. I thought he was a brilliant actor and from what I could observe, having him play Scrappy Doo was like casting Dom DeLuise to play a fat guy. Barbera loved my idea and I still don't know why it didn't happen. True, it was during a period when Mr. Morris considered himself banned from Hanna-Barbera for telling J.B. to have an intimate relationship with himself...but Barbera wasn't the kind of guy to let a little thing like that get in the way of getting a show into production. (A few years later, Howie was back working for the studio again.)
For whatever reason, he did not become Scrappy Doo and neither did my other suggestion, which was a writer-performer named Marshall Efron. I had a tape of him auditioning for another show and when I played it for everyone who had a vote, they all agreed he was ideal for the role of Scrappy Doo. And then they gave the job to Lennie Weinrib.
I still don't know why, although Lennie was pretty good in the part. He was so good that a whole week later, when I asked the producer who was Scrappy Doo now, he said, "Amazingly, it's still Lennie Weinrib." In fact, it continued to be Lennie Weinrib for the entire season...all the way until the moment when Lennie asked for more money, at which point the world went full circle and all of a sudden, Don Messick was Scrappy again. As he would continue to be for the rest of the little guy's animated life. All it took to make a firm decision was someone asking for above scale.
This concludes Part Four of The Secret Origin of Scrappy Doo. Tune in some day for Part Five in which the lady at Standards and Practices decides that Scrappy is a bad role model for children and must change his evil ways.
October 3, 2007
