I talk about all sorts of things on this blog…whatever's on my mind and a few things that obviously aren't. My opinions are worth exactly what you pay for them if you've never clicked my donate link and even less than what you sent if you did. The following — which is not about comic books or TV or old comedians or politics or the politics of old TV comedians in comic books — is being offered without any claim of expertise. It's about one of my favorite foods.
It's the Jennie-O Turkey Pot Roast, a bone-in, slow roasted turkey thigh that I consider one of the yummiest things I've ever eaten in my own home. But don't go running out and trying to find the above package in your local stores. I don't think they make them in that form anymore.
They used to. I wrote about them years ago here when I was buying them at Costco. I'd take home four or five from their refrigerator case, stick a couple in my freezer and the rest in the main part of my refrigerator. Then I'd heat one up, either in the microwave or my roaster oven, and eat dark meat turkey for two or three days until it was totally consumed. Since they came fully cooked, all I had to do was heat them and even I, a person who is to cooking what Rudy Giuliani is to winning lawsuits, could handle that.
Alas, Costco stopped carrying them. I searched everywhere and made a pest of myself talking to folks who worked at Jennie-O. For a time, I found them in similar packaging in the prepared food section of the self-service meat displays at Ralphs Markets, which is the arm of the Kroger Corporation in California.
Then they stopped carrying them. If you're a big fan of the kind of music you hear when some company has you on hold, call the number that Kroger or Ralphs gives out to call in and sound off about what they carry in their stores. You'll hear hours upon hours of that delightful music interspersed with ads to use their website. I don't think I ever got through to a human being there.
I found the Jennie-O Turkey Pot Roasts briefly at Sprouts Markets but they changed to something that I guess they thought was just as good but it wasn't. And briefly, one Ralphs near me had them, not for sale as a packaged Turkey Pot Roast but warmed and shredded and sold by the pound as Turkey Fajitas from a steam table in their service deli. But I don't think I'd had one for over five years (probably longer) until last Monday.
A week ago today, while placing an online order at a Ralphs near me, I saw them listed as among the eats they carry. I called up and a man in the deli department said, "Yeah, we have them." I jumped in my car, drove directly there…and they didn't have them. They had a rotisserie turkey breast (i.e., white meat) from another company — one I'd tried and found close to inedible. That's what he thought I was asking about when I said, "Jennie-O Turkey Pot Roast."
"Okay," I said to him. "But your website clearly says 'Jennie-O Turkey Pot Roast.'" I showed him the listing on my phone and there was a photo of one that looked like this…
He looked at the image and said, "We don't carry those." He polled everyone else working there that day and they agreed. No one could explain why the website said they did but one had a suggestion — that I call in on Monday and talk with the Service Deli Manager who doesn't work weekends. I did…and he said, "Yeah, we have those. We just took a batch out of the warmer to put in the display where we have the rotisserie chickens." I made him swear on the life of any children he has or might ever have and to promise to hold two for me. Then I drove over and bought two of these…
It's the exact same thing but though the Ralphs website calls them "Turkey Pot Roast," it doesn't say that anywhere on the packaging. It says, "Slow-Roasted Dark Turkey." That may be the cause of the confusion…and if it isn't, I'm sure it will be.
Meanwhile, this page on the Jennie-O website will tell you what's in them and if they're sold near you. I would not take the latter info as infallible. They show a number of stores carrying them in my neck of the woods but of the eight I phoned — six (including two Ralphs) didn't know what the hell I was talking about. Maybe they'll be carrying them soon — or maybe they do but like the folks on duty at my local Ralphs last Saturday — they don't know they do.
They'd had them in some refrigerator (and not on display) there at that Ralphs that day but no one working there had ever heard of them. Yesterday, having consumed the two I got on Monday, I went by and while there were no heated ones out with the rotisserie chickens, the manager happily sold me two unheated ones from the back.
I'd rather get them that way. I keep 'em in the fridge and then when I want some, I scoop a proper portion into a microwave-safe dish and get it warm in my microwave-safe microwave. They're juicier if I heat them than they are if the store does and then they sit there until someone comes in and buys one. (Note by the way that these are bone-in, meaning that the weight of one includes a large bone you remove and discard.)
Years ago when I was an uncompensated shill for the ones sold at Costco, about twenty people wrote to thank me for suggesting they try 'em. I hope to receive more such thanks again.