Major Oops!

I screwed up the link a few posts back to the Lewis Black piece on candy corn. It is now fixed. It points to this clip. Thanks to all eight thousand of you who wrote to tell me.

WGA News

For some time now, the west coast and east coast divisions of the Writers Guild of America have been engaged in a spat that got waaaay nastier in public than it should have. I explained it to the best of my questionable ability in this post.

I'm delighted to say that it's over. As announced in this letter (CAUTION: PDF file), the two branches have arrived at a settlement that — at first glance — looks to me like they split things pretty much down the middle. This is good news, as the combined WGA faces challenges and battles far too serious for us to spend time whacking each other over the head. With little in the way of inside info, I'm going to leap to a conclusion here. It's that this settlement was made possible because of a turnover in the leadership of both branches since it started.

So now the WGA can devote more of its efforts to organizing in new areas and bracing for what promises to be a nasty negotiation in 2007. Alas, there will still be internal squabbling to sap our strength. There always seems to be some faction within the WGA that is angry about something, usually an alleged (and on rare occasions, valid) breach of our constitution. The fights are always way more vicious and personal than is practical, and they waste a lot of energy and bile that is better directed towards those who are raking in zillions on DVDs while insisting that "times are tough" and writers need to accept lower compensation. Let's battle them, people. Not each other.

Black Humor

Several of you are writing me to tell me you eat and like candy corn. You lie. Compared to you people, Scooter Libby is George "Cherry Tree" Washington.

Everyone hates candy corn, even comedian Lewis Black. Here's a link [Real Player required] to his view of this noxious product that aspires to be both corn and candy and succeeds as neither.

The video file resides on a Lewis Black fan site which I discovered thanks to news from me reader Mike Lindsay. There are lots of fun video clips there. I especially recommend this one and this one. [Real Player required for both]

Today

My views of Halloween have not changed from two years ago. And the people who've written to me since then to say they like candy corn are all still liars.

Recommended Reading

Once more, I link to the free version of a Frank Rich column that some of us subscribed to the New York Times "select" service in order to be able to read.

Brown Sandwiches and Green Sandwiches

The new production of The Odd Couple, with Nathan Lane as the slob and Matthew Broderick as the neat freak, opened last Thursday evening on Broadway. Just for the sheer "event" of it all, I would have liked to be there for the opening, especially at the end when Mr. Lane interrupted the curtain ovation to say, "Oh yes, there's somebody here you should meet" and brought out Neil Simon. But I find myself curiously uninterested in jumping on a plane and going back to see subsequent performances. Even if someone gave me tickets — which no one's gonna do because they're sold out and they go for a fort-yoon on eBay — I'm not sure I'd be interested.

It isn't just that the reviews are decidedly mixed. Critics often differ but never so much as when they're writing about a show they're helpless to impact in any way. It's that I feel like I've already seen it. I know the play about as well as I know my Social Security number and I can imagine exactly what Mssrs. Lane and Broderick are doing with it. If this production was local to me and reasonably-priced, sure. I'd go and I'm sure I'd be joyously entertained. But theater sometimes becomes a big hassle, what with advance planning and securing tickets and physically getting there and…I dunno. This one just struck me as not worth the effort…not that they'll suffer one bit for the lack of my patronage.

I've seen The Odd Couple (I'm guessing) twenty times. In a live theatrical production, I mean. The movie, I've seen more times than I can imagine. But I've sat in theaters and seen live performers yell about spaghetti vs. linguini on many, many occasions — in productions professional and amateur, starring folks you've heard of and folks you haven't. I've seen it rewritten by Mr. Simon for women and rewritten by Mr. Simon just for the hell of it. It really is bulletproof but that doesn't mean everyone should take a shot at it.

Today's Political Rant

A couple of thoughts on the Scooter Libby indictment. One is that with his statement Friday and the release of the paperwork, the prosecutor rendered millions of bytes of Internet discussion inoperative and inaccurate. I don't know if people have gone back and scrubbed their weblogs but an awful lot of armchair legal analysis has been proven wrong. To pick one area of many: All the anti-Bush folks were arguing that Valerie Plame's status as a C.I.A. operative was classified and covert. All the pro-Bush folks were arguing that it was neither. The prosecutor, Mr. Fitzgerald, has access to more information than any of these folks — presumably, he has extensively talked with the C.I.A. about her actual assignments instead of deducing it from questionable press accounts — and he says her status there was classified but declined to say it was covert. (There's apparently a big difference there in terms of whether leaking the fact of her employment is a crime.)

Both sides are actively spinning this as either a blow to Republicans or a disappointment to Democrats. I don't think you can say for sure which it is yet. I mean, Libby's trial — if it ever happens — could get very interesting with guys like Cheney and Rove testifying under oath about reports of alleged uranium guys in Niger and who knew what when about Weapons of Mass Destruction. Which is why I suspect it will never occur…the trial, I mean. If I were Mr. Libby's lawyer right now, I think my main objective would just be to try and run out the clock, delaying that day as long as possible, angling for a more favorable plea bargain. Already, the statements of the guy who has that job, and the view of other barristers who've read the indictment are suggesting that winning is not a likely option.

So I'd try to make the best deal I could. And the options there are to either become a witness for the prosecution of others or to admit guilt, accept whatever sentence and fine I had to, then depend on the famous loyalty of presidents named Bush to their friends. His father pardoned everyone involved in Iran-Contra, in some cases for lying to an Independent Counsel, just as Libby is alleged to have done. Methinks the idea there was to head off a trial that might have resulted in some very embarrassing revelations about that George Bush. You kind of figure that a lot of folks around the White House don't want the Scooter Libby trial to happen for much the same reason.

Stupid Statuary

Ah, yes. Something else on which you can spend your hard-earned dinero instead of buying medicine for your ailing mother. The folks at Dark Horse Comics are coming out with another line of cute li'l figurines of classic characters and just to make the others look more important, they're including Groo the Wanderer in the set. You can order it next month. You can receive it when it comes out in February. You can stare at it from then on, expressing shock and amazement at the stunning likeness of everyone's favorite mentally-deficient barbarian. Here's where you can learn about the whole line and pre-order.

Another Thing About Indictments…

I don't know how many of you recall the McMartin Pre-School Scandal. Briefly: In 1984, it was charged that hundreds of children were molested at a pre-school in Manhattan Beach. The school's owners and employees were arrested, tried repeatedly and eventually released…by which time their lives were pretty well destroyed. Parents were outraged that no convictions were ever achieved since at some point, the evidence appeared overwhelming and the McMartin staff was pretty well convicted in the press. As the case unfolded, however, it became apparent that investigators had pressured the children to confirm tales of highly dubious accuracy. Kids, for instance, told tales of being taken down to the basement of the pre-school and forced to play "naked games"…but the school building had no basement. It also became apparent that some of the reporters covering the story were sensationalizing and misrepresenting matters and that at least one of the parents levelling accusations was, herself, mentally unstable. (If it all sounds like a TV movie, it was. It was made into a largely-accurate HBO film called Indictment – The McMartin Trial, starring James Woods.)

Today in the Los Angeles Times, one of the kids who said then that he'd been molested writes a long, amazing apology for going along with phony accusations. His name is Kyle Zirpolo and I'm not sure if he deserves praise for coming forward or scorn for not doing so years ago. Either way, it's one of those stories that's worth keeping in mind when someone looks guilty beyond any reasonable doubt. In this case, a lot of people and law enforcement officials were wrong and, worse, incapable of backing off on their crusades even after they should have realized they were wrong. It's not rare that this happens but it is rare that it becomes so obvious…and that anyone apologizes.

Doonesbury Leftovers

Garry Trudeau has a good track record for predicting what's going to happen in the world and incorporating it into his Doonesbury strip. Every so often though, his Magic 8-Ball fails him. Next week, he had a whole continuity about the Harriet Miers nomination. Now that she's withdrawn her name, those strips won't appear in the newspapers…but they are on his website.

Good Morning!

Lewis "Scooter" Libby indicted on five counts. Finally.

Recommended Reading

Michael Kinsley explains Act One of the "Plamegate" affair.

Okay, I'm going to bed. All the usual sources are telling me that tomorrow's the day we get at least one high-level indictment. I have the dread feeling I'll wake up in the morning, turn on CNN and someone will be saying, "We have Breaking News that there is no Breaking News."

By the way: In addition to seeing someone indicted, I also want to see someone "frog-marched." Just so I can find out what the hell that is. Sweet dreams!

Make My Day

Someone has been indicted! Someone has been indicted! Okay, so it's a coin dealer in Ohio…but it's someone.

Told Ya So

See? No indictments this morning. There will never be any indictments of anyone. Indictments are so over.

In other non-news: George W. Bush has "reluctantly accepted" Harriet Miers' decision to withdraw as a Supreme Court nominee. Just as last night, I "reluctantly accepted" delivery of that Chinese Food I ordered.