Yearly Archives: 2003

The story I always loved about Katharine Hepburn went roughly like this: She was starring in the musical Coco at the Mark Hellinger Theater. This was in late 1969. The show was not great — a far cry from the same librettist's My Fair Lady at the same theater — but audiences flocked to see it. Because it was Hepburn, and how often did you get to see Hepburn? I wish I had, but the closest I got was nodding to her in recognition as we crossed paths one day on Central Park South, right in front of the St. Moritz.

Evening performances of Coco were joyous but for a time, the matinees were a little rough. Next door was a construction site and a big, noisy building was being erected. After several afternoon performances were marred by the sounds of jack-hammers and rivet guns, the producers of Coco appealed to the construction company. It was only a matter of a few hours every Wednesday afternoon but the construction company said no; they had a building to build.

So Ms. Hepburn took matters into her own hands. She donned a hard hat, went next door and joined the construction workers for one of their coffee breaks. She told them the problem, passed out a few free tickets and asked them — pretty please — could they find quieter tasks to do during her Wednesday matinees? The workers were charmed by this tough but regal lady and agreed. For the rest of the run of Coco, a whistle would be blown just before curtain on matinee day. Airguns and heavy machinery would go silent and other, gentler work would be done until the workers saw the audience leaving the theater. Burly construction guys, it was said, actually tip-toed. And if someone raised his voice, everyone would tell him to shush and they'd point to Hepburn's picture on the marquee.

That's how I always heard the story, which is not to say I believed it. Something about it struck me as just too "public relations office" to be completely credible.

Then a few years ago, I was with my friend Sergio and his wife, Charlene. Charlene was one of the dancer-actresses in Coco, and somehow the name of Katharine Hepburn came up. Before I could ask about the construction site story, Charlene said, "She was wonderful. Everyone thought so…even the construction workers next door." And she told the story about Hepburn putting on the hard hat and going over to ask them to hold it down.

I love it when one of those stories turns out to be true.

Is your spam getting chummier? I mean those unsolicited ads that turn up like cyber-cockroaches in your e-mailbox. Mine used to have subject lines like, "Get rich quick" and "Hot babes waiting for you." Those weren't quite as annoying because you could delete them without even opening them. So now the Spammers are doing their best to trick you into thinking they're sending you a normal e-mail exchange. They enter a subject line that says, "Here's the info you requested" or "As we were discussing" or "You're right about that."

Another fairly recent trick is the intentionally misdirected message — the one that looks like you accidentally got someone else's e-mail. You get a message intended for "Steve" that says, "Here's the password to that great secret X-rated website I told you about. Use it but don't let anyone else know." Someone has been recently been sending me a bevy of stock tips that were intended for "George" and which say they're based on top-secret insider info. It's like I'm getting spammed by Martha Stewart.

Spammers are annoying but sometimes they're creative. I just got one with the subject line, "Are you hard at work?" I guessed what it was but couldn't resist actually opening the e-mail to check. Sure enough: An ad for Viagra.

Does anyone out there have copies of scripts from the old Jay Ward "Fractured Fairy Tales" cartoons? If so, could you drop me a line? Thanks.

Here's what's up with the new show by Harold Prince, John Weidman and Stephen Sondheim.

Bill Clinton on the situation with the F.C.C. giveaway ruling. (Thanks to master illustrator Dan Gheno for the link.)

As mentioned a few items back, I saw Fred Travalena this afternoon at the Hollywood Collectors Show. I love impressionists and Fred is one of the best…one of those guys who surprises you not only with his range but with the way he gets inside whoever he's doing. There are some samples of his fine work over at his website.

Frank Kelly Freas isn't really a comic artist. He's an award-winning illustrator and painter working primarily in the areas of science fiction and fantasy. But he did wonderful covers for Mad Magazine for years and that's a good enough reason for me to direct you to his website.

Because Strom Thurmond lived so long and managed to occasionally turn on the charm, a lot of people have been able to minimize or rationalize his past as a rabid racist and advocate of segregation. Lest we forget, The Smoking Gun offers us this peek at the platform on which he ran for the presidency.

I wished the senator no ill but if he didn't want people to hold this against him, he should at some point have declared that it was wrong. Even George Wallace (our last major presidential candidate who couldn't pronounce "negro" without making it sound like that other "n" word) managed to repudiate his segregationist positions.

Dropped by the Hollywood Collectors Show up at the Beverly Garland Hotel in North Hollywood. These are those quarterly gatherings where a wide array of actors and actresses sell autographed photos and books and such. Shirley Jones (squired by hubby Marty Ingels) was probably the biggest "new" name in attendance…though there was also a pretty large line for Verne "Mini-Me" Troyer. They had Mr. Troyer and several other little people on one side of the room and a bevy of Russ Meyer starlets on the opposite side. I was worried the room was going to tip.

Chatted with Fred Travalena, Bruce Kimmel, Eddie Deezen, Stella Stevens, Felix Silla, Leo Gorcey Jr. and a few others. Ran into Chuck McCann, who was wandering the aisles. Bought some autographed books. Fun time. Stopped and got the car washed on the way home. No Spraywax or Armor-All. End of report.

One of the sweetest, funniest ladies I've ever worked with is Victoria Jackson. You know her best from several seasons of Saturday Night Live. She was part of that show during what I consider its best years…and yes, I'm including the first five in that evaluation. Before SNL, she was a wonderful presence on Los Angeles stages and at comedy clubs…and if you go see her do that kind of act today, you'll see why she was so popular. Over on her website, she sometimes posts where she's going to be.

Maybe I'm wrong but this whole notion of Arnold Schwarzenegger running for governor strikes me as a publicity stunt — one that the muscular thespian would have cut short if he didn't have Terminator III coming out right about now. Assuming the governor's mantle would be a nightmare job. The state's finances are in a mess and it will require hard, long-term planning to even begin to right the ship of state — especially difficult for a Republican who would have to deal with a Democratic legislature. As governor, Arnold's salary would go down, his standard (and locale) of living would decrease, and he would be interrupting a successful movie career in what may be his last few years of being able to land starring roles with multi-million dollar salaries.

And for what? Jesse Ventura jumped into politics but Jesse's wrestling days were over and he needed a new career. Ronald Reagan's days as a movie star were long behind him and anyway, he wanted to be president — a job for which the foreign-born Schwarzenegger is ineligible. Yes, there is a certain prestige and honor that Arnold may crave…but there are too many potential humiliations out there, starting with the possible losing of the election and alienating a large chunk of the electorate in the process. Looking like a loser won't help the opening weekend of Terminator IV or whatever else he wants to do in Hollywood in the future.

Mr. Schwarzenegger always struck me as a pretty smart guy. His success as a movie star has turned to some extent on his willingness to go out and hustle and promote, even to the extent of mocking his accent and physique. He has a lot of years invested in that success. Odder things have happened but I can't see him being willing to risk it all for what could — win or lose — turn out to be a humiliating situation. He just doesn't seem like a guy who's eager to cut short his acting career…especially with so few apparent upsides.

Al Feldstein was the editor of MAD Magazine for more than a quarter of a century and before that, he was the editor-writer of most of the EC comics of the fifties, including Tales From the Crypt, Weird Fantasy and Crime SuspenStories. Those are stunning achievements…so it's easy to forget that before he was an editor and writer, he was an artist. And when he retired to a ranch in Wyoming, he returned to art — to painting western scenes and the occasional EC re-creation. You can see some of his lovely work over on his website.

At some point during his long, intolerant career, Strom Thurmond must have said, "They'll legalize homosexuality over my dead body."