I tried to watch a little of the Alito confirmation hearing today, which just shows me that I'm not as smart as I think I am…or something like that. Hard to say which of the three was the most boring: The Democratic Senators giving long, pontificating preambles to hardball questions that Alito was not about to answer, the Republican Senators giving long, gushy prefaces to softball questions that he welcomed, or Alito saying nothing of interest in response to either. I always feel these things insult our intelligence by pretending there are open minds where none exist. The Senators all know how they're going to vote, which will be pretty much along party lines. (I saw Orrin Hatch on MSNBC. I think Alito could have confessed to strangling cocker spaniel puppies and Hatch would be saying what a fine, admirable man he was.)
And Alito knows how he's going to vote on most of the important issues that will come before him. I mean, come on. The guy's a judge. Even I have an opinion on Roe versus Wade and I write cartoon shows for a living.
Years ago in a bout of the same masochism that once caused me to eat at a Denny's Restaurant, I watched most of the Clarence Thomas hearings. I don't know why I did it…just hoping for a moment of honest candor that never came. Didn't hear it from the Senators of either party, didn't hear it from the nominee. I still don't know about Anita Hill but she wasn't aspiring to a lofty position in our government so she didn't matter as much. What I think I was waiting for was for some Democrat to say, when it was his time to speak, "Judge Thomas, all this crap about what you said to someone about privacy rights in a law lecture twelve years ago is irrelevant. The president nominated you for this position because he thinks you'll advance his Conservative agenda. I intend to vote against you for precisely that reason. Thank you. I'm done." Ted Kennedy, Joe Biden and all the rest could say that today to Alito but it wouldn't get them as much camera time.