My Tweets from Yesterday

  • They're saying Newt's about to get out of the presidential race. Oh, and he was doing so well… 23:42:24
  • Too bad Elliot Spitzer never ran for president. He and the Secret Service would have gotten along just fine. 23:46:21
  • Just made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich without peanut butter or jelly. I think some people call this "two slices of bread." 23:47:20

My Tweets from Yesterday

  • Today's potatoes are from the Driscoll Brothers Farm in American Falls, ID. I hear the Driscoll boys raise a mean spud. 21:30:52
  • Just learned the joy that occurs when you order your fries at Five Guys and ask for them "well done." @Five_Guys 23:04:37

My Tweets from Yesterday

  • At the premiere of the big Stan Lee documentary. I was just offered a special martini "created and formulated to honor Stan's spirit." 19:53:05
  • At the premiere of the Stan Lee Doc. Of approx 500 people at this party, I seem to be the only one who knew him in a previous century. 20:04:36
  • Hanging by the bar. I could go in and watch the documentary but I don't think I could take seeing my head large enough to fill that screen. 20:10:29
  • I just told Stan, "There are more important people at this party but I'm the only M.M.M.S. member!" I think he liked that. 20:28:16
  • Someone just asked me if Stan created Batman. I told him, "No, but he will!" 20:32:46
  • Apart from the fact that I can't make out 90% of what people are saying to me, this is not a bad party. 20:35:49
  • Just remembered how many deadlines I have. Think I'll go home and, believe it or not, write a comic book. 20:43:39
  • Just paid six bucks for parking. Stan doesn't validate. 20:47:57

Recently Tweeted by me

  • Definition of an eternal optimist: Just got an e-mail from a Ron Paul supporter who's convinced his guy has the presidency in a bag. #

Recently Tweeted by me

  • The Farrelly Brothers should film 4 new scenes, splice them into their new Stooges movie, give it a new title and release it as the sequel. #
  • The same folks who voted for Santorum because he was Not Romney will be voting for Romney because he is Not Obama. #

Recently Tweeted by me

  • Today's potatoes are from Brad Reed Farms in Idaho Falls, ID. First time I've ever gotten the same potato source twice. #
  • Today, I was approached by what I thought was a homeless guy who wanted $ for food. Turned out to be Newt trying to get on a ballot. #
  • In the sequel to the 3 Stooges movie, they'll replace the guy who kinda looks like Curly with an actor who kinda looks like Shemp. #
  • Top Secret Service Alibi: "We thought the hookers were assassins so we threw our bodies on them and wrestled them to the ground!" #

Recently Tweeted by me

  • Betcha the budget for movie with fake Stooges is 10 times the budget for all the movies ever made with the real guys. #
  • The Stooges movie is a big hit. And another hit. And another hit. And a poke in the eyes. And a vase broken over the head. And… #
  • What's this about Newt Gingrich bouncing a check? Who does he think he is? A comic book publisher? #
  • The Three Stooges are hotter than they've ever been. Apparently, the only thing they needed was to be three other guys. #

Recently Tweeted by me

  • Sheldon Adelson, the Vegas tycoon who backed Newt is building a casino in Spain and another in Macau. Note he has no plans for the Moon. #
  • Someone spilled 10,000 lbs of pet food on a freeway in L.A. The four feral cats in my backyard could polish that off by rush hour. #

Recently Tweeted by me

  • Mitt Romney upon hearing Santorum is out: "Is it time to move to the center yet?" (No, he really didn't say that…I assume.) #

Recently Tweeted by me

  • Today's potatoes are from Brad Reed Farms in Idaho Falls, ID. They certainly taste like they are. #

Recently Tweeted by me

  • My mother turned 90 today and I gave her a nice gift: The day off from doing my laundry. #
  • Just read the 800th article saying the next primary is "make or break" for Santorum. Just like the one before and the one before… #
  • Gingrich admits his campaign is hopelessly in debt; vows stay in race and to keep making speeches about how Democrats spend too much. #

Recently Tweeted by me

  • Today's potatoes are from Brown's Farm in Rexburg, ID. #

Recently Tweeted by me

  • The California lottery jackpot's up to $540 million and people are rushing to enter. Because who'd want to win when it was only $450 mil? #

Recently Tweeted by me

  • Today's potatoes are from; Rigby, ID, Silver K Farms. #

Recently Tweeted by me

  • More outrageous behavior. Tonight at a premiere in Hollywood, the Pillsbury Doughboy got flour-bombed, #