If you're at the Comic-Con next week and you want to know how many people are in the hall, it's real simple. Count the number of folks dressed as The Joker and multiply by six. I'm betting there'll be more Jokers there than you'll find in all the Video Poker machines in all the casinos in Vegas.

The Joker has always been a popular costume. It combines the three most appealing characteristics of a convention outfit: It's inexpensive to do, it gets you noticed and it makes you look like you're out of your friggin' mind.

Of those, "inexpensive" is probably the big reason. At Halloween time, you can buy everything necessary to be The Joker from the neck up for about ten bucks at your neighborhood CVS Pharmacy. You need a cheap green wig (the cheaper, the better), some white grease paint, a lipstick in some garish shade and maybe an eyebrow pencil to arch your own brows in some manic way. Then all you need is a really hideous outfit — anything as long as its colors clash enough to blind a hippie. You may already have one in your closet. It's a great opportunity to wear your gayest, zootiest suit in public.

Imagine what would be involved in building a really impressive Iron Man costume. I'm guessing weeks of labor and a few thousand bucks. Then imagine what it would take to Jokerize yourself. It's a no-brainer.

I usually see six or seven Jokers per convention. Once, I had my picture taken with three of them at once but I decided not to post it because I look like the odd one in the photo. This year, with all the fuss about Heath Ledger and the upcoming Batman flick, I'm guessing they'll be out by the dozens. They may even outnumber Klingons, which will be fine with me. Just so long as they don't outnumber good-looking women dressed as warrior princesses, jungle ladies and, of course, the original Supergirl.

Sunny most days with a few clouds Thursday morning, Saturday morning and again late Sunday. Highs around 72 degrees, lows around 62. A mild offshore breeze most of the time. Not much humidity. Overall, pretty decent con weather. It'll be up to five degrees warmer inland, away from the coast.

I just watched the debut of The Gong Show With Dave Attell on Comedy Central.

The is the fourth incarnation of The Gong Show. Who would have thought we'd ever refer to the original, the one hosted by Chuck Barris, as the "watchable" version?

You wanna know how inane this new one is? The person on it who retained the most dignity was Andy Dick.

And speaking of Mike Peters…next week, he'll be a Special Guest at the Comic-Con in San Diego where, if I know Mike, he will attempt to personally hug every one of the 120,000 guests in attendance. Years ago on one of his trips to L.A., I was driving him to the airport and we stopped off for dinner on the way. I took him to a favorite barbecue restaurant of mine and introduced him to the cook, who was a grizzled old western type who could have won a Gabby Hayes look-alike contest. (Do they still hold Gabby Hayes look-alike contests?)

Mike loved the cuisine and we got to talking…and suddenly, I looked at the time and gasped, "Mike, we needed to leave for the airport fifteen minutes ago!" As I bolted from the table, Mike said, "Wait! Before we go, I have to go into the kitchen and hug the chef!" And he did.

The man is a brilliant cartoonist as you can see over on his website, which seems to be down at the moment, probably due to a right-wing plot. You can see how fast and funny he is if you attend the Quick Draw! panel at Comic-Con a week from this Saturday. This is one of the most popular events at the con and I'm betting that this year's will be mobbed.

Imagine if you will: On the stage are three cartoonists, each sitting at a projector. Whatever they draw is simultaneously projected onto a large screen in front of you, the audience member. I am out in the audience with a microphone, having you help me come up with silly challenges for these cartoonists, asking them to whip out sketches based on our suggestions. It's always hilarious. Ask anyone who's seen it.

Two of the cartoonists are always Sergio Aragonés, who has been drawing for MAD since John McCain was a toddler, and Scott Shaw!, master of Oddball Comics, Flintstones and many other fun things. We've had some brilliant folks in the third seat but as long as we've been doing this, I've yearned to get Mr. Peters in that spot. When you see his pen in action, you'll see why. Here's the official-type listing…

Saturday, July 26
11:15-12:30 Quick Draw! — It's the battle of the cartoonists, featuring the one artist who may be the match for the reigning champs! Join Sergio Aragonés (the world's fastest cartoonist), the quick-witted and quicker-penned Scott Shaw!, and the new kid, editorial and syndicated cartoonist Mike Peters (Mother Goose and Grimm), as they place their pens to paper to do their fastest, most clever work, while you watch them draw on the big screen. Host Mark Evanier puts them through their paces in one of Comic-Con's most popular annual events. Room 6CDEF.

And if you find Mike as fascinating and funny as I do, you'll want to attend the following conversation between the two of us later that same afternoon…

4:30-5:30 Spotlight on Mike Peters — You may have seen them match wits at "Quick Draw!" earlier in the day. Now Mark Evanier and Pulitzer Prize winning editorial cartoonist Mike Peters sit down for an hour-long talk covering Mike's incredible career, including the hugely popular syndicated comic strip Mother Goose and Grimm (and cartoon show, better known as Grimmy). Room 8.

There are many things you'll want to do at the con. Make sure that seeing Mike Peters is among them. You'll get a chance to meet a brilliant cartoonist…and you may even get hugged.

I held off commenting on this just in case there's a big cash prize for being the one-millionth person on the Internet to comment on the New Yorker cover about Barack Obama…

Yes, you're offended by it. You're supposed to be offended by it. The question to me is whether you're offended by the fact that there are people in this country (people who will actually vote) who believe some or all of that about Senator Obama. Or are you offended by the New Yorker summarizing and satirizing that viewpoint? I'm with the first group and I think there's a value to the latter. There are plenty of folks in this country who are now more vocal than ever in denouncing the low I.Q. of those who believe this crap and/or those who know it's a lie and deliberately spread it. I kinda like that. Better to get it out in the open where it can be ridiculed than let it be spread unscathed via e-mails and whispers.

The other day on Talk of the Nation on NPR, three friends of mine — comedian Paul Mooney and cartoonists Art Spiegelman and Mike Peters — discussed the cover. The exchange between Art and Mike is interesting but I think I side with Art. The New Yorker didn't invent this view of Obama and I don't think that cover will convince anyone it's valid. It's more likely to debunk it. You can hear the broadcast on this page.

Ultimately, I think Jon Stewart got this one right. Obama should have responded by saying something like, "Of course I'm not offended. Muslim extremists get offended by cartoons and I'm not a Muslim extremist."

Last Saturday morning around 6 AM, two men attempted to rob a restaurant here in Los Angeles. The restaurant was Lawry's the Prime Rib, a fine institution where I often dined when I was eating larger portions than I now crave or could digest.

The men put a gun to the skull of one of the chefs and asked, "Where's the money?" Then they demanded to know where the safe was. When the chef told them he couldn't open the safe, the intruders got spooked (that's what it said in all the news reports) and fled. It turned out that the police had been monitoring the two chaps — they'd pulled armed robberies before — and as they left, they were immediately tracked by a police helicopter and pursued by units on the ground.

It all ended not far from where I live. One of the thieves was shot before they both surrendered and were taken into custody…a nice ending, of course. But there's something I want to know…

Why Lawry's? Of all the places in this city to pull an armed robbery, why Lawry's? At six on a Saturday morning?

How much could they possibly have gotten? True, a meal at Lawry's is not cheap. It's been years since I got out of there for under $40 a person and that's just meat, mashed taters and creamed corn. I'm sure with wine and dessert, it could run twice that…but this just suggests to me that most people pay with credit cards. How much cash might the restaurant actually have had on hand?

And what made the crooks think it would be there at six in the ayem or that a chef would have had access to it? The place doesn't even open until 4:30 in the afternoon on a Saturday. If they did collect any significant amount of cash the night before, would they be likely to keep it on the premises for the whole weekend?

Also: That guy who cooks and carves prime rib for a living probably has a pretty sharp knife within arm's reach and is very skilled at handling it.

I can understand not wanting to rob a bank. Banks have security guards and cameras and all sorts of anti-robbery devices. But the penalty for armed robbery is pretty much the same wherever you rob. Shouldn't you pick a place that's likely to have a large sum of greenbacks on hand? I'll bet they could have gotten more loot at a Denny's. Plus, at 6 AM, they could have gotten a Grand Slam Breakfast to go.

A brief chat with Garry Trudeau. Why am I not surprised that he's a Randy Newman fan?

I really admire the effort and artistry of the JibJab videos. Out of just about nothing, those folks built an art form and a style and what I gather is a pretty successful company. One of the ways they've achieved this is by really putting maximum effort into each project. A lot of people out there think computer animation is easy; that you just click this and load that and the computer does all the labor that formerly had to be done by hand. Wrongo. Each JibJab video represents skillions of person hours and an awful lot of hands-on artistry. Here's a link to their latest — "Time for Some Campaignin'" — and here's a link to a production blog that should give you some idea how much perspiration went into it.

I like what they do so much that I'm hesitant to write this next part and toss in a "however."

However, I will. With so much effort going into each frame of animation, you'd think they'd expend a bit more time on their song parody lyrics, particularly in making them rhyme. In most cases, it wouldn't be difficult. For instance, this new video opens as follows…

Come gather 'round, Dick, Condi, Scooter and Rove
It's time to get packin', we must hit the road
But there's wars and recessions and bad mortgage loans
And our legacy needs savin'
So forget he's a jackass who's lib'rally prone
Oh, it's time for some campaignin'.

I'm not sure if the folks who wrote this thought "Rove" rhymes with "road" but if so, they're wrong. "Loans" doesn't rhyme with "prone" because "loans" is plural. "Savin'" does not rhyme with "campaignin'," either.

What baffles me about this kind of lyric is that it's so easy to fix. It could easily go like this…

Come gather 'round, Condi, Rove, Scooter and Dick
It's time to get packin' and hit the road quick
On account of each war and each bad mortgage loan
Our popularity's wainin'
So forget he's a jackass who's lib'rally prone
Oh, it's time for some campaignin'.

That took, literally, under a minute to redo. Give any decent songwriter a half hour and he or she might have improved it into Sondheim territory…or at least The Capitol Steps. The JibJab professionals are so thorough with their graphics and animation and details that it makes me wince that they rhyme "command" with "Vietnam" and "near" with "years." ("Exchange," by the way, does not rhyme with "change." It's the same syllable. It's like rhyming "moon" with "moon.")

Come on, guys. You do everything else so well. Get your lyrics up to the standard of your animation.