George W. Bush's Iraq policy sure makes a good Monty Python sketch.

This one was suggested by my longtime pal, Russell Myers. Russell draws the wonderful comic strip, Broom-Hilda, which can be read online on this page. But he didn't suggest you read his strip. That's my suggestion. What he suggested is that I favor you with the following Spike Jones clip. It runs almost eight minutes but, hey, you have nothing better to do for the next eight minutes. So sit back, click and watch as Spike — wearing one of his more conservative outfits — conducts "The Poet and Peasant Overture." The funny guy with the banjo is Freddie Morgan and of course, you'll all recognize Jim Backus…

Fred Kaplan didn't think much of Bush's address to the nation.

I have a couple of friends who still support…well, I'm not sure if they support George W. Bush because they support the War in Iraq or if they support the War in Iraq because they support George W. Bush. But some of them do and a couple of them don't seem to understand why so many of us support neither.

To them…to anyone who's wondering…I recommend spending two and a half minutes and watching Keith Olbermann tick off a list of past rationales and statements that have been offered in support of our nation's efforts in Iraq. It's rather an amazing list and you can watch it over at this link.

That's about how I looked when I was eight years old and I had to go to a neighbor and apologize for breaking their swimming pool thermometer.

I'm afraid I don't have a great Yvonne DeCarlo anecdote to toss up here today. The one time I ever saw her in person was around 1965, the first time I took the Universal Studio Tour. Today, that experience is like an amusement park ride with stunts and effects, but back then, they used to actually take you where movies and TV shows had been or were currently being filmed. At one point, we all got off the tram and were led through "an actual star's dressing room." In this case, it was allegedly Yvonne DeCarlo's…and it was a nice little room but there was really nothing of interest to see in it. There was certainly nothing that indicated Yvonne DeCarlo had ever set foot in the place and I got the feeling that the next tour group to shlep through would have been told it was where Gene Barry or Doug McClure got dressed.

A little later, we were back on the tram and it was ambling past the stage where The Munsters was filming. We didn't get to go in but Al "Grandpa" Lewis was dawdling outside in full make-up, fiddling with script pages. He acted like he was trying to memorize lines but it was obvious that he was trolling for attention, waiting to be spotted by the tourists so he could feign annoyance…but still come over and sign autographs for his adoring public. I mean, if you're dressed up as Dracula and your skin's painted blue-green, you don't loiter where the trams go by unless you want to be noticed.

Anyway, Mr. Lewis signed and bantered with us…and then someone spotted her. Yvonne DeCarlo, partially but not fully made-up as Lily Munster, was rushing towards the stage door. In contrast to Grandpa, she was trying to not be recognized. The people on our tram started calling to her, yelling "Lily" and "Miss DeCarlo," hoping she'd come by and scribble out a few autographs, too. But she gestured and waved as if to say, "I'm really sorry but I can't" and disappeared inside. Grandpa Al waited until he had everyone's attention back and then announced, "They haven't finished turning her into a monster yet. She doesn't like people to see her at her best."

Big laugh. I'll bet it wasn't the first or last time he used that line.

I'm sorry I don't have a better Yvonne DeCarlo story than that because she was, at least on-screen, a classy lady who had an incredible career. I hope the reason they hadn't finished her make-up wasn't because we'd thrown her out of her dressing room. She deserved better than that.

Max Boot, who has pretty solid credentials as one of them, warns that Conservatives are likely to blame the failures of Iraq on the media. And he says that's nonsense.

As I explained in this article, I was always a fan of the great ventriloquist, Señor Wences. I didn't always understand what he and his many voices were saying but I used to enjoy just watching him. It was quite a thrill to meet the man on two occasions, one being a party to celebrate the fact that he had just turned one hundred.

Señor Wences did essentially the same act for around seventy years. It varied due to time restrictions and sometimes had to be altered because of the particular venue in which he was playing. But it was still the same wonderful act, and he knew it backwards, forwards and in about eight languages. Here's six minutes of that act…

George W. Bush is going to address the nation this evening, reportedly to tell us that he's going to ignore the wishes of most of the nation (and a surprisingly high percentage of our military leaders and Republican members of Congress) and proceed with "The Surge." It may not be much of a surge because we don't have enough troops for that. And it may take quite some time to surge properly…but damn it, we're going to surge. Okay, so it'll mean a lot more of our soldiers getting killed. Isn't that ever so much better than Bush having to admit he screwed up?

It reminds me of something I used to say when I worked on a lot of variety shows. I had a producer who'd come up to me before every sketch and ask if it was going to be funny. I'd always say yes and then I'd point to one of the other writers and say, "In fact, I'm willing to put his job on the line."

And is there something symbolic in the fact that on one network, Bush's speech will be preempting Deal or No Deal?

It will interest at least two regular readers of this site that I know of to hear that NBC is not going to waste a new episode of that game show tonight. They're rerunning the one from last Sunday — the one with the lady who was a fan of the movie Grease — and then in the time zones where the presidential address displaces Howie and the models, NBC will join Deal or No Deal in progress, after the speech.

Personally, I think Bush should just have 26 models come out with his Iraq plan. Each model would represent one percentage point of his approval rating by this time next week.

Looks like it's going to be a big year for you…if you're a penguin.

Just a reminder: Tomorrow morning at 9:30 AM Eastern Time (6:30 AM on this side of the U.S.), Turner Classic Movies is running Don't Worry, We'll Think of a Title, one of the crummiest but fun obscure movies ever made. It was produced and co-written by its co-star, Morey Amsterdam and it also stars Rose Marie, Richard Deacon and a bevy of cameo stars including Danny Thomas, Carl Reiner, Cliff "Charley Weaver" Arquette, Milton Berle, Nick Adams, Forrest Tucker and — as you can see above — Moe Howard. There's also a nice character role by Henry Corden, who most of you will recognize as the second voice of Fred Flintstone.

I am not suggesting you will find this movie funny. I'm not even suggesting you'll be able to make it all the way through to its bizarre ending. I'm just suggesting some of you will enjoy taking a look at this sucker.

Obits for Iwao Takamoto (like this one) are all over the web and some of them are pretty loose with their assignment of credits. Most say Iwao was the creator of Scooby Doo…an honor that has also been (at different times) claimed by or attributed to Joe Barbera, Fred Silverman and the writer-producer team of Joe Ruby and Ken Spears. As far as I know, Iwao himself never claimed to have done any more than design the look of that show and its characters…and even then, he was the main designer, not the only one.

Several wire stories also say that Iwao named the dog, having been inspired by the portion of the record, "Strangers in the Night" where Sinatra warbled, "Scooby dooby doo…" I don't think Iwao did that and I don't think Iwao ever claimed he had. Everyone has always given credit for the naming to Fred Silverman, who was then the CBS exec in charge of Saturday morning. (And I've always wondered if he isn't misremembering; if the record in question wasn't "Denise," a medium-sized hit by Randy and the Rainbows. Here's a link — which may not work for all browsers — to a few seconds of that classic recording. What Frank sang in "Strangers in the Night" sounded more like "Shooby dooby doo…")

In any case, I wish people didn't use words like "creator" and "created by" so casually. To give someone credit for something they didn't create is to deny it to someone who did. That has personal ramifications and these days, it may also have legal and compensatory ones, as well.

Iwao was a brilliantly talented artist. It's too bad more of you haven't seen his original concept and presentation drawings, which often far exceeded anything that made it onto your TV screens. And he did come up with the basic and/or final design of more popular TV cartoon characters than almost anyone else. He never wanted, nor does his memory require credit for things he didn't do.

50+ of you have now e-mailed me this article about a planned sequel to It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World and asked me what I think about someone making a follow-up to one of my favorite movies.

I think, first of all, that this proposed film is a long way from getting in front of a camera. No director is mentioned, no stars, no studio, no distributor. There seems to be a script but the screenwriter is not even named. So this is most likely an article that's being planted in the press in the hope of generating interest from studios, major stars, etc.

Beyond that, I wish them well. If it's a great movie, we all benefit. If it isn't, it doesn't despoil the original in any way. Naturally, there's always cause for skepticism when someone aspires to replicate past greatness. It wouldn't seem likely that it could be achieved in this case. The big appeal of the original started with its huge budget and this sequel doesn't seem to have huge financing.

And that huge budget bought a stellar cast. Assuming the producers come up with that kind of cash, there's some question as to whether it's possible to assemble a comparable roster of stars. Today, your top comedy stars are used to getting salaries that amount to 5-10% of a film's total budget so you can't just go out, meet established price quotes and lasso the top ten folks in that category. That's even assuming you think Will Ferrell, Robin Williams, Adam Sandler and Jack Black are somehow equivalent to Sid Caesar, Milton Berle, Buddy Hackett and Jonathan Winters.

Maybe that's the big problem. The original Mad World was a celebration of a certain kind of comedic actor who is currently in short supply. A lot of the major laughs came from the mere appearance of certain people…seeing that the firemen dispatched to prevent a disaster were The Three Stooges, for example. Or watching Don Knotts enter a scene and anticipating what was about to happen because it was Don Knotts. I can't think of too many current comedians whose screen presence is so well established in advance. But hey, I'd love to see them pull it off. Karen Sharpe Kramer, widow of the man who directed the original, is a smart lady and I'm sure she'll do it right or not at all. It's not sacrilege that someone wants to make a movie as good as a great film of the past. It's actually a commendable goal.

I had to turn off the first episode of Grease: You're the One That I Want…a "reality" show that was just too phony for me. Perhaps there are Broadway auditions that are conducted in such a stark manner, with auditioners insulted to their faces after they sing a few bars of something without even piano accompaniment. But those auditions are done in private without the employers trying to act like Simon Cowell, wringing emotions out of those trying out. I guess the publicity and national interest bodes well for the new production of Grease that's heading for Broadway. But it doesn't bode well for the show that two key roles are being cast in a manner that would (and should) scare off any performer with an ounce of dignity.

Actually though, there's a bit of a trick at work here. The reality show is only trying to cast the roles of Danny and Sandy, the parts played by John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John in the movie. In fact, they're acting like they're casting the movie, not the play. Most of the auditioning ladies sing "Hopelessly Devoted to You" and the whole TV competition is called "You're the One That I Want" — two songs that were not in the original stage version and were only added for the movie. They're now sometimes inserted into live productions of the play…though they weren't in the 1994 Broadway revival. Even if they're added to this new incarnation, it probably won't change the fact that Danny and Sandy aren't the stars of the stage version. It's more of an ensemble piece and will surely stay that way.

Before that show aired on Sunday night, there was a special Grease-themed episode of Deal or No Deal. I still like this show, at least when viewed with judicious use of the Fast Forward button…but their new "twist" is silly. At the end of each game, the contestant is now given the opportunity to play "Double or Nothing," picking one of two giant cases. One says "double" inside. The other says "nothing."

In theory, this gives the show the right to say that their top prize is now two million dollars but that's just theory. It's never gonna happen. In order to win the two million dollars, you'd first have to win the one million dollars. No one has yet. Then you'd have to decide to gamble the whole million on a 50-50 chance of turning it into two million. No one's ever going to risk the million. In fact, most players win whatever they win on the show by turning down better gambles than that.

I'm told this option is popular on Deal or No Deal programs in other lands but I don't see why. The worst thing about the show is when we watch an occasional contestant be embarrassed to go home with some small amount because they got greedy. And as long as they keep playing "Double or Nothing," each game will end with an opportunity for the contestant to go home with nothing because they got greedy. I'd hate to think people would find it entertaining to watch someone blow the wad that way.

Since we seem to be having a kidvid festival here, I'll toss in one more…a short one. Among my favorite non-cartoon shows when I was younger was The Magic Land of Allakazam, a filmed show starring magician Mark Wilson. It debuted on CBS in October of 1960, ran two years on that network and then switched to ABC. I was eight when it began and — of course — it instantly got me hooked on magic.

I tuned in initially because between tricks, they showed Huckleberry Hound cartoons. But by then, I knew all those cartoons by heart and the magic was new and exciting, so I was actually happy when they eventually got rid of Huck and just did more magic in each show. By then, I'd cleaned out the local public library of every book they had on magic and had learned how to do a batch of mystical feats…including one card trick that is still, I'm embarrassed to report, part of my repertoire.

Mark Wilson, by the way, continues to perform magic but is mainly a teacher and consultant. His spouse — "the lovely Nani Darnell," who you'll see in our video clip — handles a lot of his business dealings. Last year, I took a card manipulation class at The Magic Castle. It was not taught by Mr. Wilson but Nani handled the sign-ups and tuition collection and such. Now, you'll have to imagine the following…

We're all in the classroom — guys about my age, all wearing jackets and ties because you have to wear a jacket and tie when you go to the Castle in the evening. Nani comes in and handles the last of the paperwork, then leaves…still looking quite lovely, almost a half-century after the filming of the video below. As soon as she's out of the room, our instructor (a very famous, important magician) admits that he started doing magic decades ago because he had a crush on her and thought that that was the way to get women who looked like that…

…and every guy in the room, myself included, nods in understanding and agreement.

When you hear magicians say that they were inspired by Dai Vernon or Blackstone or even Houdini…well, that may be true in many ways. But I'll bet Nani Darnell caused more young men in the early sixties to become magicians than any of those guys. Wilson had his son, who was about my age, perform a trick on each episode and I guess that was because they thought it would motivate young viewers to take up magic. Well, they were wrong. We were all motivated by the cute blonde lady.

I should mention that you can buy DVDs of the old Magic Land of Allakazam shows over on Mark Wilson's website and I've just placed an order for some, myself. Our link today is to a one minute commercial for the series from when it aired on ABC…