Recommended Reading

George F. Will discusses the British terrorist bust and what it may mean to us. One of the things he thinks it means is that John Kerry was right when he said that although the war on terror will be "occasionally military," it is "primarily an intelligence and law enforcement operation that requires cooperation around the world." Of course, when Kerry said that, no Conservative — not even Mr. Will — would view it as anything other than some sort of admission of weakness.

Recommended Reading

Joe Darby is the man who blew the whistle on the Abu Ghraib prison scandal. He has come forward to tell his story and it's well worth your attention. I'll let you read the descriptions of torture for yourself but here's one section that's startling in another way. It comes after Darby has reported multiple abuses of law and morality to his superiors…

So I knew if I wanted to go back to my civilian life, if I wanted to integrate back home, nobody could know what I'd done. They'd never forgive me. And I was assured by the army that nobody would know. I would remain anonymous.

Well, it didn't work out that way. About a month after Graner and the rest of them left Abu Ghraib, we were up in Camp Anaconda, and I was sitting with ten other guys from my platoon in the dining facility. It's a big facility, packed with like 400 other soldiers, and I'm sitting there eating when Donald Rumsfeld comes on during the damned congressional hearings. It was like something out of a movie. I'm sitting there, and right next to me there's a TV, and Rumsfeld is on it when he drops my damned name. Almost nobody in my unit knew what I'd done until he dropped my damned name. On national TV. I was sitting midbite when he said it, and I was like, Oh, my God. And the guys at the table just stopped eating and looked at me.

So they promised his name would remain secret and then Rumsfeld went before Congress — on international TV — and volunteered the name of the informant. Lovely. Do we think this was a screw-up or a punishment? Neither is particularly admirable.

Fair Warning

This made me laugh out loud so I had to share it here. It sounds a lot like a certain Monty Python sketch…

Welsh-speaking cyclists have been left baffled — and possibly concerned for their health — after a bizarre translation mix-up.

The temporary sign, placed in front of the roadworks at Barons Court roundabout between Penarth and Cardiff, correctly says "cyclists dismount" in English, but says "llid y bledren dymchwelyd" in Welsh.

Owain Sgiv, an officer for the Welsh language campaign group Cymdeithas yr Iaith Gymraeg, explained: "Roughly translated, 'llid y bledren dymchwelyd' means 'bladder disease has returned.'"

Recommended Reading

Rich Lowry on why Iraq is looking more and more like Bush's Vietnam. This is another one of those articles where I don't agree with every word but I think the view is worth a read.

Assault and Battery

Here's another way that bloggers can have an impact on the world. For some time now, tech blogs have been complaining about the tendency of the batteries in Dell Laptops to explode and burst into flame. Here's an example. Here's another example. Here's another example. Here are photos of a Dell Laptop exploding at a conference in Japan.

Dell has now announced what may be the largest recall in the history of consumer electronics. It's possible they would have done this anyway but the bloggers probably hurried things up a bit. And that means that a few less laptops will go kablooey, which is a good thing.

By the way: You can't bring a bottle of Arrowhead Mountain Spring Water onto an airplane in this country. But you can bring a Dell Laptop with a battery that can explode and burst into flame. Fill in your own snide remark.

Recommended Reading

Adam Cohen discusses the legal heritage of Bush v. Gore, the Supreme Court decision that first put George W. Bush into the White House. Here's the paragraph that most interested me…

The heart of Bush v. Gore's analysis was its holding that the recount was unacceptable because the standards for vote counting varied from county to county. Having once granted the right to vote on equal terms, the court declared, the state may not, by later arbitrary and disparate treatment, value one person's vote over that of another. If this equal protection principle is taken seriously, if it was not just a pretext to put a preferred candidate in the White House, it should mean that states cannot provide some voters better voting machines, shorter lines, or more lenient standards for when their provisional ballots get counted — precisely the system that exists across the country right now.

So, uh, how come that hasn't changed?

I know a lot of Republicans (including Antonin Scalia) tell Democrats to "get over it" but the article has a point: If it was valid law, it doesn't go away. It should be defensible in the context of ongoing legal decisions. By the way, the last person who told me to "get over it" is still posting in chat rooms that the Clintons should be arrested for the murder of Vince Foster.

I have a feeling that we're going to wake up one morning and find that some future configuration of the Supreme Court has said Bush should never have been installed in the job in 2000. The way things are going, we may see a majority of Republicans say that before long.

Duh…

For those of you who find Sudoku puzzles too complicated, the Washington Post had one yesterday that Goober Pyle could solve in under three minutes. Here it is. It's almost as tough as the one I posted a few weeks ago.

Today's Video Link

How'd you like to watch six minutes all about the original, 1975 production of the Broadway show, Chicago? The two men interviewed together are the men responsible for its score, John Kander and the late Fred Ebb. They talk about its director, Bob Fosse. Gwen Verdon and Ann Reinking talk about Bob Fosse. I think the guy at the end is New York Times political commentator (then, its Broadway critic), Frank Rich.

There's also some footage here of the original cast and one of the dancers you'll see is the lovely, leggy Charlene Ryan who was a Fosse favorite. (She was also in the both original Sweet Charity on Broadway and in the movie.) Charlene is now married to my friend, Sergio Aragonés. Every time I refer to Sergio as "the fastest cartoonist in the world," Charlene sighs and says, "Tell me about it."

And on that cheap sex joke, let's go the videotape…

VIDEO MISSING

Dino Dollars

AFTRA (the TV performers' union) has recently and happily announced a settlement of nearly a million dollars, negotiated on behalf of performers who appeared on The Dean Martin Show and whose performances have been put out on DVD. This is a very nice and just thing for the performers and I suspect it will serve as a nice precedent for future legal actions. A lot of DVDs have been issued by companies that haven't bothered to properly compensate performers, writers, directors or others who are contractually entitled to some cash, and the guilds have been slow to raise the proper stink.

And here's something that interests me in a strange, "small world" kind of way: AFTRA announced the settlement on this page over on their website. Among those who'll be sharing in the bucks — and are interviewed about it there — are two former dancers from The Dean Martin Show, Lynne Latham and Larri Thomas. Lynne was one of the Ding-a-Ling Sisters on Dino's show and later, she was a frequent dancer on shows I used to write for Sid and Marty Krofft. Very talented, charming lady.

I never met Larri Thomas but I know she was a Goldwyn Girl…one of the dancers in the 1955 movie of Guys and Dolls, in fact. Later, she was a favorite of the great choreographer Hermes Pan, who used her in the acclaimed Fred Astaire TV specials. And a friend tells me — and I swear this is a coincidence; I was going to write about this before I was aware of the possible connection — she's the woman who played Miss Clinger in the Allan Sherman clip I linked to this morning.

Recommended Reading

Fred Kaplan on the recently-voted U.N. cease-fire resolution. What will it mean if it succeeds? What will it mean if it fails?

Recommended Reading

Over at The Christian Science Monitor, they're serializing the story of the kidnapped (and released) journalist, Jill Carroll. It looks a lot like someone's attempt to sell her story as a movie but that doesn't mean it isn't an important and interesting tale. And given how much apparent fabrication was introduced into the press by people trying to spin it to serve their political goals, it's about time we heard her account of what happened. It's over here with more to come in the following weeks.

P.S.

In this item posted earlier, I suggested a number of reasons why George W. Bush might be withholding his endorsement of Alan Schlesinger, the Republican candidate for Joe Lieberman's senate seat in Connecticut. Several correspondents have suggested another. Apparently, Mr. Schlesinger has called for substantial U.S. troop reduction in Iraq on a timetable.

So what you have in that state is a Democratic candidate who wants the troops withdrawn soon, a Republican candidate who wants the troops withdrawn soon, and an Independent candidate (Lieberman) who says a number of conflicting thing but seems to eventually side with the administration. If you were George W. Bush, how would you play this one?

Stan-ding Ovation

At a ceremony last Saturday evening, my hero Stan Freberg received the prestigious Los Angeles Area Governors Award from the Academy of Television Arts and Sciences. These are the Emmy-giving-out people. Nancy Cartwright, best known as the voice of Bart Simpson, made the presentation and Stan accepted, accompanied by his puppet, Orville. In the screen grab above, Orville is the one without the glasses.

The Academy has put the entire event online in webcast format at this link…but wait. STOP! For God's sake, in the name of all that's holy, don't click on that link yet! The show's almost three hours long and even though Keith Olbermann does a nice hosting job, there's no way you want to sit through the whole thing. You just don't.

Here's what you want to do. Go to that link (here it is again) and start playing the webcast…then fast-forward or move the slider over to 01:09:10, [SEE BELOW] which is about where Olbermann introduces Nancy Cartwright who, in turn, introduces Stan. The whole presentation, including Stan's wife Hunter, a film about his career, Stan (with and without puppet) and his acceptance speech runs about eighteen minutes. And make sure you stay tuned after Stan exits to hear a quick story about him from Mr. Olbermann.

Lastly, a brief aside to the Academy, of which I am a member: I think it's wonderful that you honored Freberg. No one deserves it more. But if you're going to honor someone, it would be nice if a wee bit more research was done. Yes, Stan was the voice of Cecil the Seasick Sea Serpent on Time for Beany…but you played him on and off, not with any of the dozens of hit songs he wrote but with the theme song from the Beany and Cecil cartoon show, which he had nothing to do with. And he made that wonderful entrance right after the tribute/history film on which you MISSPELLED HIS NAME! Come on, Academy. Your Mission Statement says you exist to "…promote creativity, diversity, innovation and excellence through recognition, education and leadership in the advancement of the telecommunications arts and sciences." Somewhere in there, it's kind of implied that you should your spell your honoree's name correctly. I would return my Emmy in protest if I'd ever won one.

[UPDATE: Since this was posted, the Academy folks have done a re-edit on their online webcast, shortening the proceedings. The introduction of Ms. Cartwright now commences 56 minutes into the video. So leap ahead to 00:56:00 and watch from there. And thanks to Don Brockway for calling this to my attention.]

Alan Who?

I often feel sorry for presidential press secretaries. They're sent out there with marching orders to say X and not say Y, and then they're hammered by reporters because to say X and not Y is not logical. You can almost hear the press secretary thinking, "Hey, I know this is bull but it's what they told me to say."

Tony Snow, current holder of that thankless job, was obviously instructed not to say that George W. supports the Republican candidate for the senate in Connecticut. This may be because that candidate — someone named Alan Schlesinger — is currently polling at 6% and Bush doesn't want to get caught backing someone who may not get out of the single digits on Election Day. Or maybe there's some sort of loyalty or payback involved with regard to Joe Lieberman on a personal level, and Bush doesn't want to oppose him, at least for the near future. It could even be simple political gamesmanship: Schlesinger can't win so Bush figures he's better off with Lieberman than Lamont and wants Connecticut Republicans to vote accordingly.

Whatever the reason, Mr. Snow has to go out and not say that Bush supports Schlesinger…and act like it's the most normal thing in the world for a Republican president to not endorse the Republican candidate for some high office. Here's the exchange. It's probably close to word-for-word what would have been said if reporter Tony Snow was grilling the press secretary for a Democratic president who was trying to not endorse a Democratic senatorial candidate.

Game Over

whatsmyline

We are unsurprised but saddened still that GSN has finally decided to chuck the nightly reruns of old episodes of What's My Line? They go away later this month, only to be replaced by — insult to injury time — reruns of The Amazing Race. And we'd like to suggest loudly and with great outrage in our voice that low ratings on What's My Line? may have been caused by GSN leading into it with reruns of Beat the Clock, the stupidest and crappiest game show ever produced.

The lone remnant of the network's long experiment with hoary black-and-white reruns will be a bone they'll be tossing us once a week, late on Sunday nights…or, more correctly, early on Monday mornings. There, commencing August 27/28, they will run sixty minutes of old Goodson-Todman classics or semi-classics. They'll start with two shows, one being Get the Message, a 1964 series hosted by Frank Buxton and later by Robert Q. Lewis. The other, which they've run before, is What's Going On?, a short-lived 1954 disaster of a game show, produced by the star of several recent video links on this site, Allan Sherman.

ATTENTION, FRANK BUXTON: I expect you to send me juicy anecdotes I can post here about Get the Message. Never mind spending the lavish residuals you will doubtlessly receive for these airings. Please share with us whatever you remember. I promise not to run out on you the next time we have lunch together.