I just found this over on YouTube. Someone took the opening and closing from the Dungeons and Dragons cartoon series and dubbed them over with the theme song from the TV series, Falcon Crest. I think it works rather nicely. And if you look real fast, you'll see my name in there somewhere.

No word yet on when these are coming out on DVD but a fair amount of cash has been spent producing "extras" for the set so I assume it won't be long.

Michael Kinsley sorta/kinda defends George W. Bush on the whole matter of "signing statements" — you know, where he signs a law and then quietly issues a memo that says he can violate any part of it he doesn't like. Generally speaking, those who have defended this practice have said, in effect, "He's president…he can do what he likes." This is a position I don't buy and I suspect they won't either, the next time we have a Democratic president. I don't know that I buy Kinsley's argument either, but at least it's based on principle rather than partisan loyalty.

A little while ago at a speech, Donald Rumsfeld got into a verbal bout with an audience member. Here's the video and here's a transcript.

I'm pleased when any public official — even the ones I grudgingly support — are called out for inconsistent statements or apparent lies but I think this kind of thing misses the point. Rumsfeld and others said they knew where Saddam had his chemical weapons. There were no chemical weapons to be found at those locations. The question to them should not be, "Why did you lie?" The question should be, "Why should anyone who was so wrong about something so important still be calling the shots?"

He has the support of Ralph Nader. That's all it takes.

There was much ancillary damage on 9/11. Apart from the people who were killed or injured and the buildings that were destroyed, there were lesser but significant losses such as impacted many businesses. One was Broadway where attendance immediately plunged to a ghastly low. Five shows posted closing notices and there were many others that were in imminent danger because the cash flow dropped to a trickle.

To remind people that they were still performing, the stars of every show then playing got together and made an amazing commercial — amazing because of the logistics involved. Pulling it all together at all was impressive. Doing it so soon after September 11, in a city still in shock and at its busiest intersection, was close to impossible…but it was done. The audio was pre-recorded on September 27 and the scene in Times Square was shot the following day with an amazing cast. Just in the front row in the photo above, we see Bebe Neuwirth, Susan Lucci, Joel Grey, Michele Lee, Valerie Harper, Bernadette Peters, Betty Buckley, Elaine Stritch, Nathan Lane and Matthew Broderick. Elsewhere in the spot, visible in quick flashes, are Alan Alda, Harvey Fierstein, Brooke Shields, Adolph Green, Glenn Close, Brian Stokes Mitchell and quite a few other stars. (Dick Cavett's in there somewhere but I don't see him.)

Today's featured video is the 30 second version of that commercial. There was also a longer one — 60 seconds, I assume. And there was a little 3-4 minute featurette that was kind of a "making of" video. It used to run often on the Trio network and I somehow failed to save a copy of it. If you have it (or the minute-long version), please drop me a line.

Someone at a watch-making company sat down, I'm convinced, and said, "You know what's wrong with our watches? It's too easy to tell what time it is. How can we make it somewhat difficult?" Here's what they came up with.

Some of you may be sick of hearing about the Stephen Colbert speech by now but I find the various reactions kinda fascinating. And so is this, in a way.

The C-Span people have been apparently going around the Internet getting sites to take down online videos that use the C-Span coverage. They, of course, have every right to do this but I hope they'll realize that one of the reasons so many sites have posted it is that the online video feature on the C-Span site is awful. For one thing, it uses Real Player, which ain't as good as some other things. For another, their links only work about 25% of the time. Most of all, they only offer full events…so if you want to watch just Colbert, you have to deal with a three hour online video just to see the last twenty-four minutes.

I posted two sets of links to Colbert's speech earlier here, one of which no longer works. But these seem to. And in the meantime, ABC News has posted what they shot that evening. This is different coverage with no cutaway shots for audience reactions and, it seemed to me, a little more laughter in some places.

At the end, Colbert runs a video skit of how he'd fill the job of Bush's press secretary. ABC's coverage does not show this tape, though you hear its audio. Instead, the ABC camera (they seem to only have had one there) was trained on George W. Bush throughout the video and you see his reactions. He chuckles in some odd places and seems pretty uncomfortable when Helen Thomas is asking her eternal question about why we invaded Iraq. Here's that video. (An ad may or may not precede your viewing of it.)

I'm having trouble with e-mail today. About two dozen that I sent earlier do not seem to have arrived and I now cannot receive or send out at all. I can access the Internet and update this website and play Sudoku online…I just can't transmit or read e-mail. I assume the Comcast people will get this fixed soon…though if it's in the hands of the technician I spoke to earlier, I may have to abandon the 'net and resort to carrier pigeons.

Over on Salon, where you have to watch a lot of ads if you're not a subscriber, there's an except from Lapdogs, which is a new book by one of my favorite political writers, Eric Boehlert. His thesis, with which I agree, is that the press in this country was so afraid of being accused of being anti-American or pro-terrorist that they misreported the Iraq War (and certain other matters), bending over every which way to not challenge the Bush administration. Here's one paragraph from the article…

It's not fair to suggest the MSM [Main Stream Media] alone convinced Americans to send some sons and daughter to fight. But the press went out of its way to tell a pleasing, administration-friendly tale about the pending war. In truth, Bush never could have ordered the invasion of Iraq — never could have sold the idea at home — if it weren't for the help he received from the MSM, and particularly the stamp of approval he received from so-called liberal media institutions such as the Washington Post, which in February of 2003 alone, editorialized in favor of war nine times. (Between September 2002 and February 2003, the paper editorialized twenty-six times in favor of the war.) The Post had plenty of company from the liberal East Coast media cabal, with high-profile columnists and editors — the newfound liberal hawks — at the New Yorker, Newsweek, Time, the New York Times, the New Republic and elsewhere all signing on for a war of preemption. By the time the invasion began, the de facto position among the Beltway chattering class was clearly one that backed Bush and favored war. Years later the New York Times Magazine wrote that most "journalists in Washington found it almost inconceivable, even during the period before a fiercely contested midterm election [in 2002], that the intelligence used to justify the war might simply be invented." Hollywood peace activists could conceive it, but serious Beltway journalists could not? That's hard to believe. More likely journalists could conceive it but, understanding the MSM unspoken guidelines — both social and political — were too timid to express it at the time of war.

If you want to believe that coverage unfavorable to Bush's worldview is bias or that reporters sit around all day figuring how to subvert him, don't bother reading the piece. Some right-wingers will never turn loose of that way of denying bad news, just as some left-wingers will forever cling to the conspiracy theories they use to insulate themselves from reality. But if you're open to the idea that Bush's plunge in popularity is at least in part due to us now knowing things we should have known years ago, you might want to sit through the ads or, better still, buy a Salon subscription.

Early this AM, I was reminiscing about the original Pee-wee Herman Show at the Groundlings. That brought this message from my old pal Dawna Kaufmann…and I'm not sure if I'd forgotten that Dawna was involved with the show or if I just plain never knew. Here's some of what she remembers…

All the early meetings were in my Hollywood apartment, as we brought in John Paragon, Edie McClurg, John Moody, Lynne Marie Stewart, Ivan Flores, Tito Larriva and "musical maniacs" Brian Seff and Monica Ganas, aka Rick and Ruby. Gary Panter designed the colorful look of the production and its poster, his then-wife Nicole was cast as an actor, and their pal Jay Condom (nee Cotton) composed the wacky music and theme song. Rounding out the team were brilliantly inventive puppet makers, set builders and techies. At some point near the premiere, Bill Steinkellner was brought in as another pair of eyes and served well as director. The line producers were Betsy Heimann and Chuck Minsky, who then and now have huge careers in the film biz, respectively as a costume designer and a cinematographer.

The script was written by the performers; I didn't take a writing credit, although I should have; my credit was variously Executive Producer and Executive in Charge of Production. We would rehearse at the theater, and I would audio tape each rehearsal, then Paul and I would spend hours honing the script. It was tough editing out some very funny bits but I insisted it had to be done. I brought in and edited the 1950s training film about school cleanliness, as well as the Mr. Pincushion Man cartoon and a Gumby adventure. An elderly opera singer named Dora Romani, whom we found at Sarno's restaurant, was our opening act. She would work in the audience and flirt with all the men.

The Groundlings let us have the theatre for weekend midnight shows, and we opened on Feb. 7, 1981. I had designed a media campaign to promote the show, calling it "a late-night kiddie show for kids of all ages." I controlled the guest list, making sure that anyone who could help get out the word would be rewarded with free tickets. The Groundlings Theatre was a 99-seat venue and by opening night we had 2,000 people begging for seats.

Throughout our run the most amazing folks would be in the audience, including Robin Williams, Steve Martin, Marty Scorcese, Robert DeNiro, Cindy Williams, Cheech Marin and others. It became such a cultural touchstone that Melrose Avenue, which at that time was a dead zone at midnight, suddenly took on a hip appeal. In the months we played there, we watched that area become the technicolor place to be. Eventually, it became necessary to move to the Roxy Theater, where we could expand the show and play more nights, at earlier times. We transferred our set, cast and crew to Sunset Boulevard, and clicked there too. During the day, Paul and I would meet with TV networks as we saw our dream of turning the project into a series take shape.

Paul's agents brought in a music video director and the show was sold to HBO's just-beginning On Location series. We taped our last night at the Roxy as the show you still see running on HBO, which is what the DVD on Image Entertainment will consist of when released in July. The major difference in the Groundlings vs. Roxy productions is that Ivan Flores, who was a school kid, was replaced by Joan Leizman, another Groundling, who plays the hypnotized woman in the audience on the HBO show. For the HBO version, we also had to drop the Gumby cartoon when we couldn't make a deal with Art Clokey. We also didn't include Dora Romani on the HBO program, but I understand a rough tape of her will be on the DVD.

Mostly my memories are terrific, knowing I helped put into the world one of the greatest comedy collaborations ever.

Thanks, Dawna…and I know you won't mind my observation that the version at the Roxy, though quite wonderful, wasn't as wonderful as what I saw down on Melrose the first time. And come to think of it, the version that aired on HBO wasn't as wonderful as what I saw live at the Roxy. Which is not to say people shouldn't buy and enjoy it.

The one time I worked with Paul Reubens, he struck me as a very canny guy with a good sense of how far Pee-wee could go…which was far from infinite. On ye olde Internet, one often finds the myth that his CBS Saturday morning show was cancelled because of that silly legal mess he got into down in Florida. In fact, he had retired both the show and the identity long before that, which is why the infamous booking photo of him had long hair. He hadn't played Pee-wee in quite some time figuring — I assume — that the character had run its course…and maybe that it wasn't going to play as well as he got older.

But while it lasted, it was quite enjoyable — the show at the Groundlings and the Roxy, the TV series and at least the first movie. I always thought Pee-wee was funny and that that first show was one of the most memorable nights I ever spent in a theater. I wish someone had captured that on tape…but then again, a lot of what made it great was that sense of audience involvement. So I guess you had to be there.

Fred Kaplan reads the Barry McCaffrey memo so we don't have to. General McCaffrey's conclusions are that everything the hawks want to achieve in Iraq is probably possible but it's going to take a lot more time, money and American lives than we're probably willing to expend.

This morning, we have a lesson on "Lunchroom Manners." Some of you may recall this film from the original Pee-wee Herman Show, especially when it was performed on the stage of the Groundlings Theater over on Melrose Avenue. Others may even recall seeing the film in school. It runs nine and a half minutes and we can all learn much from it.

I am reminded of that first, live Pee-wee Herman Show in 1981 at the Groundlings. Paul Reubens was amazing in the role, so totally consumed by it that it was hard to remember that he was an actor playing a part and the guy really wasn't like that. There was also a wonderful back-up cast that included Phil Hartmann (he later dropped the last "n"), Edie McClurg, John Paragon and Lynne Stewart. Even the art direction of the set was memorable. I think but am not sure it was done by cartoonist Gary Panter, who later designed the Pee-wee's Playhouse show for CBS Saturday morning.

Pee-wee lobbed Tootsie Rolls into the audience (one got me in the eye), showed cartoons (and the public service film of today's video link), chatted with people and puppets…and at the end of the show, he actually learned how to fly. You kind of had to see it but the mood in the room was just magical enough to believe it.

The night I saw it, there were delays so though the festivities were supposed to commence at Midnight, the show didn't begin until around 12:30. It was also a night when clocks were turned ahead so we got out around two hours later at what was technically 3:30 AM…and it still wasn't over. The show didn't end so much as it adjourned to Canter's Delicatessen down on Fairfax. Much of the audience went there as did most of the actors, some of whom remained in character. My date and I got back to my place after 5 AM, feeling not like we'd seen a show but that we'd spent the night in a parallel universe. (There was a thick fog that night which added to the Twilight Zone feel of it all.)

The show later moved to the Roxy Theater on Sunset where it was shorter, done at a respectable hour and nowhere near as special. For one thing, it became a show…whereas on Melrose, there had been that sense of having entered a different world. The Roxy engagement was taped for an HBO Special which is coming out on DVD in July and I guess it's okay if you never saw any other version…but I thought it caught about 25% of the wonderment of what I'd seen at the Groundings.

At one point in the show, Pee-wee shared the following film with us. Take notes. You wouldn't want to be a Mr. Bungle.

Yesterday, I posted this video link to a Don Rickles performance and speculated it was from the early days of Showtime. Not so. Michael Kilgore informs me it's from Rickles, a 1975 CBS special with guests Jack Klugman, Don Adams, Michele Lee, James Caan, Michael Caine, Jack Palance, Elliott Gould, Bobby Riggs, Larry Linville and Loretta Swit. I vaguely remember that show. It had some excerpts from Rickles' Vegas act but it also had musical numbers of him dancing with a line of showgirls. It was very…odd.

Greg Mitchell makes an interesting point on Stephen Colbert's speech at the White House Correspondents' Dinner: Yeah, maybe it was tasteless…but not as tasteless as Bush's speech at the 2004 event when he joked about not finding Weapons of Mass Destruction in Iraq.

Couple of folks wrote to ask what I thought of George W. Bush's speech/skit that preceded Stephen Colbert's the other night. I thought it was actually a clever idea. I suspect that it came about because someone at the White House said to someone else, "You know, Bush is at his worst when he's trying to be funny. If only we could bring in a stunt double for him to handle the comedy…"

Bush impersonator Steve Bridges did a good job. My mother, who has vision problems, said she couldn't tell looking at the TV which Bush was the real one. George W. probably deserves some credit for going along with the bit and doing some pretty self-deprecating material. I wouldn't have thought he had it in him.

It's tempting to read some subtext into a few of the lines. Bush has pretty well demonstrated that he doesn't think much of reporters, even the ones who report things his way, and I don't think it was untrue that he would rather have been somewhere else that evening. (Later, after Colbert, that seemed even more likely.) But as Freud should have said, sometimes a joke is just a joke.

Here's the video of the routine…