Barack Obama gave his speech to school kids this afternoon. There's an elementary school down the block from me and I guess they heard it because all the students are out goose-stepping and wearing little Hitler mustaches. They're even demanding health care for all because as we all know, that's the first thing Nazis care about. And it's such an easy slippery-slope from "Stay in school" to "Don't be stupid, be a smarty…"

I'm not mad at the crazies. If anything, we should be grateful to them for driving the moderate voters towards the Democrats. I guess I'm a little disappointed in the "have it both way" statesmen like John McCain who want to preach sanity to their party but not in any way that's going to alienate the insane.

They remind me of those sixties' politicians who didn't want to side with the separatists and racists but also didn't want to lose their support. A lot of them learned to pronounce the name they used for the African-American race as "nigra." That way, they thought, the Equal Rights crowds would hear it as "negro" and the Klan voters would hear the other "n" word. It was like that scene in that Red Skelton Civil War movie where he walks between the warring troops with a two-sided flag — Union on the side facing that army, Confederate on the side facing them. John McCain thinks all this talk about "Death Panels" is nonsense…but of course, Sarah Palin is still a woman of great integrity.

The 2009 Jerry Lewis Telethon raised $60.5 million, down a notch from last year's $65 million. Given the state of the economy and unemployment, that's probably still an impressive total. I generally enjoyed the "show" part of it, especially the first 12 or so hours, which seemed to contain (with a few exceptions) better acts and less melodramatic tales of illness. Years ago, the telethon was often criticized — sometimes even by patient groups — for not treating the afflicted with sufficient dignity. They've toned that down and it may be why they were able to raise as much as they did.

Jerry was Jerry. As I said earlier, I think he tries too hard to do his old act. Is there any other performer who goes on national television these days with a Jolson medley? I have the feeling that if Jolson was alive, even he wouldn't go out there today and do a Jolson medley.

There's also something endearing about Jerry's rambling monologues and his attempts to interject "topical" references by mentioning Vic Tanny and Liberace. Usually, he's good for at least one Helen Keller joke per telethon. He did one this year but for some reason, he said "Anne Bancroft" instead of "Helen Keller," and I don't think anyone in the audience had any idea what he was talking about. He also seemed crankier than usual, especially during the too-plentiful tech problems.

That's about everything I wanted to mention. If you TiVoed the show and haven't watched the wee small hours, make sure you at least seek out my buddy Charlie Frye, who did some great magic stuff around 2 AM. I called Charlie this afternoon to say I'd seen him and he said, "You and about seven others." But that was a joke because there were probably an awful lot of people watching. I wish Jerry could or would attract more major stars for prime time because it seems kinda sad when you realize that the biggest name of the hour is Charo. But I'm glad they have on folks like Charlie who just plain do good acts. They had a lot of them overnight.

It's 5:40 in the morning. Jerry, in a pre-taped spot, just introduced Celine Dion, singing a pre-taped number. More importantly, the script I'm up writing is starting to read like it was written at 5:40 in the morning. Good time to go to bed.

Watching the telethon. I thought we'd reached the point where Jerry disappears for the night but he keeps popping back up. He looks shaky and a little too determined to be the "old Jerry," singing and tap-dancing and doing his old routines. Please…someone tell this man that there's no shame in changing your act as you get older.

A lot of interesting acts, including Jerry's regulars like Bob Zany and Maureen McGovern. Sad to see that Charlie Callas apparently isn't well enough to be there and had to be represented by a tape of an old appearance. My buddies Charlie Frye and Ronn Lucas are soon to appear.

It's nice to see all these folks getting national exposure. Still, you wish the telethon had the kind of importance that would come from some superstars dropping in, the way Frank and Sammy used to. Bill Cosby's playing Vegas this weekend. Is he not there because he didn't want to appear? Or did someone think Jer couldn't cope with another comedy legend on his stage?

Speaking of which: I just thought of a clip I oughta link to…

The Station Fire, as they're calling it, erupted off Angeles Crest Highway at 3:20 Wednesday afternoon, August 26. As of now, it has burned 157,220 acres and destroyed 76 homes with damage to at least thirteen more. Another 7000 structures are still threatened. Two firefighters have died and nine more people have been injured.

Currently fighting the are twelve helitankers, seven helicopters, eight air tankers, 243 fire engines, 149 hand crews, 60 bulldozers and several thousand able bodies. Estimated cost of this fire is around $44,000,000 and at the moment, it's the tenth-largest fire in the state of California since 1932. It could place higher.

Right now, it's 51% contained and officials are hoping for full containment by September 15, more than a week from now. Keep in mind that "containment" does not necessarily mean "out."

It has been determined that the fire was man-made and an arson investigation has commenced. I thought this was dreadful before I heard that. The idea that someone would deliberately cause something like this makes it all the more horrifying. I can't imagine what kind of punishment would be appropriate for that person. I'd say, "Give him a conscience and a true realization of what he did," but that's just too barbaric.

Hollywood Superblogger Nikki Finke has finally mentioned that the two warring factions in the Writers Guild have made peace. She hasn't however mentioned that from all reports, last Wednesday's "Meet the Candidates" night was a lovefest that patched up even more differences than did the joint statement she quotes. Given how many important folks in the industry follow Finke's column (and they should — she's good at digging up vital news), it might be nice if she mentioned that but it may not matter.

I'm a big believer in the Writers Guild. I don't necessarily believe in every union and even once helped sue one labor organization that I thought was corrupt and/or inept. (It was hard to tell which.) But I believe in the need for a strong Writers Guild to provide for the common defense of those who seek to ply that trade. In forty years as a professional writer in a dozen different arenas, I've come to appreciate how badly my profession can be treated when it's "every man for himself."

I am not, however, a big believer in the ability of the WGA to hang together and work together. When I was active in its operations — mostly in the early attempts to bring animation writing under WGA jurisdiction — I was appalled at the member-vs.-member invective…the personal attacks on folks who were unsalaried volunteers. Since I never stood for guild office, relatively little was directed my way but I watched it wound a lot of folks who, to put it simply, didn't deserve that kind of abuse. Even if I disagreed with their vision for the Guild, I thought the lack of civility towards them was more injurious to the WGA than anything the attackees were trying to accomplish. For one thing, it caused a lot of good people to decide they didn't want to have anything to do with the running of the union. Eventually, that group included me.

Every so often, I'm asked to participate again and I'm tempted. Then something comes along to remind me that I really don't want to do that. The latest is a video which Nikki Finke also features — an attack on our outgoing president, Patric Verrone. Some obviously think it's funny. Some don't and I'm with the "don't" crowd. I've had my differences with Patric but I think he did a helluva job steering our Guild through its recent strike…and I like the fact that even those currently running against his "slate" seem to think that, as well. I think that deserves better than an anonymous cheapshot at him and at the writing career that he put on semi-hold to serve the WGA.

I have no idea how Patric feels about it. He's demonstrated pretty thick skin so he may even find it amusing. I'm less bothered by that than I am by how this kind of thing discourages participation in Guild affairs. I'm sure going to remember it the next time I get one of those calls asking me to serve on a WGA committee or project.

If you don't get enough Jerry Lewis this weekend watching the telethon, you can enjoy this two-and-a-half hour video interview with him. I haven't made it all the way through myself. Let me know if he says anything about meeting me when I was seven.