ASK me: Neil Simon

Georgi Mihailov writes…

On Neil Simon's 90th birthday, which would you say are your favorite and least favorite of his plays? I also have a question about The Gingerbread Lady.  Some say it is based on the life of Judy Garland, while others cite the original actress Maureen Stapleton as the source material. Do you know who Evy was based on?

My favorite Neil Simon play is easy: The Odd Couple.  It may be my favorite play by anyone, though the last few times I've seen it, I was a bit bored. I know it so well and I've seen it done so well that I don't have a whole lot of tolerance for those who do not do it well. (One of the worst productions of it I ever saw, by the way, was when Jack Klugman and Tony Randall were touring in it. They both just kind of seemed to be on auto-pilot, racing through the lines like they were eager to get to dinner.)

Least favorite? Well, I never saw his last few like Rose's Dilemma, The Dinner Party, 45 Seconds From Broadway or Proposals. I did see and didn't particularly like Oscar and Felix: A New Look at the Odd Couple, which updated (and for me, diminished) a play which I thought should be encased in lucite and never again altered. But I even less liked Rumors, so I guess that's my answer. It struck me as a very ordinary farce comedy, indistinguishable from all the others where they pile lies on misunderstandings and misunderstandings on lies.

As for The Gingerbread Lady: In one of his autobiographies, Rewrites, Simon tells of finishing the play, sending it to Mike Nichols (who wound up directing it) and having Nichols tell him that the only actress who could play the role was Maureen Stapleton. Simon then says he said…

I said, "God, I know this isn't really Maureen's life, but there's parts of Evy that she might see in herself, in her past. I don't want to hurt her. This is not really Maureen. It's ten, twenty different actresses I've met over the years who could be Evy. Some people might even think it's Judy Garland."

Maureen Stapleton did play the part and that's one reason a lot of people thought it was based mainly on her…but I think we should take what Simon wrote at face value. Most times when any kind of writer bases any kind of work on someone, that person is a point of starting inspiration and then the work veers off into speculative fiction. Usually, you don't just write about that person and change their name. There are exceptions to this but they're pretty obvious…and even then, a certain amount of fiction always creeps in. A lot of actresses were cited as models for the lead character in The Gingerbread Lady. Elaine Stritch thought it was her and was angry with Simon that he hadn't cast her in it.

Incidentally, I must quietly note that it has been several years since Neil Simon made any sort of public speaking appearance or was interviewed, and he hasn't had a new play or screenplay in over ten years. I don't want to spread or start rumors about illness or incapacity because I honestly know little about his current life. As an admirer though, I have to note how sad it is that we are hearing no more from this witty, once-incredibly-prolific man.

ASK me

Your Frank Oz News Update

Mr. Oz at right, just being Bert.

Frank Oz is, of course, the great puppeteer (Muppeteer, actually) turned film director.  Here we have a recent interview with him about how he feels about the Muppets — especially the characters he birthed like Cookie Monster, Fozzie Bear and Miss Piggy — living on and being performed by others.

And here is news of the re-release of his 1986 movie of Little Shop of Horrors, which is now being put out there with its original, darker ending. When first made, it ended with a very-costly-to-film finale in which the evil plants won and the two leading characters were killed. Test audiences recoiled so Oz and his crew went back and filmed a new, happily-ever-after ending in which Seymour and Audrey won and lived to wed.

The rumor is that the film's owners decreed that the footage for the unhappy ending would never be seen (or maybe saved for a possible sequel) but someone who didn't know about the decree included it on the first DVD release. Further rumor has it that there was much anger and threats and that the first DVD release was recalled…but of course, many were sold before that. At one point, copies were selling for megabucks on eBay and of course, it later found its way to YouTube as all video eventually does at least for a while, copyrights be damned.

I understood why they made the change. What I didn't get was why they so thoroughly deleted all that wonderful special effects footage of the interplanetary plants destroying the world. Seems to me they could have used some of that, then cut to Audrey and Seymour saving the day before the plants' takeover was complete. Anyway, the film will now be available with the We-All-Die ending if that's what you wanna see.

The linked article wonders if people will indeed wanna see that. I dunno…but I'll bet most people who now experience the movie will think that the CGI of the giant plant is really well done, so much so that you could almost believe they had a real, working plant of that size on the set.

But of course, they did. It wasn't CGI, though everyone will assume it is. They built the giant puppet at great expense and it was operated by a whole crew of puppeteers. And here's something you might not know: The plant was so big and hard to operate that they had to manipulate it, at least during its lip-sync moments, at half-speed. The audio for those scenes was pre-recorded and slowed down by half, then the puppeteers moved the plant in accord with that reduced-speed audio…and later, that film was sped so the audio was normal and the movements matched the soundtrack. That meant that if, for example, Rick Moranis was in the same shot as the plant, Moranis had to move at half-speed also. That can't have been easy.

Lights Out!

Power in my neighborhood went out around 11:15 last night. My TiVo, which is plugged into one of my many uninterruptible power units, recorded Stephen Colbert's show without getting Stephen Colbert's show since the cable was out along with the power.

I finished what I was then writing since my computer's plugged into another uninterruptible power unit.  Then I shut it down and sat here in the dark, reading and answering e-mail on my iPad and blogging. I had a bit of light since I have these all over my house…

There are several brands of these things but these were the cheapest when I bought them many years ago and they've worked fine for me. These are Capstone 561 Eco-i-Lites. You plug them into outlets and they do nothing while your electricity is on except stay charged and if you wish, act as night lights and convenient flashlights. When the power goes kablooey, they turn on and you can grab the little flashlight out of its charger/holder and not be in complete darkness. They're very handy and here's a link to order one if that sounds like a good idea. Or maybe you'd like to shop around for a better price because I haven't looked lately. Some other brand might be cheaper now or better suited for your set-up.

So I phoned the D.W.P. and got a recorded announcement that told me crews were working diligently to restore service and they had an estimated time of 3:04. The ":04" part surprised me with its precision but I figured they just ask someone, "When do you think the power will be back on at Evanier's house?" (I'm sure that's how they ask it) and someone else says, "Oh, about three hours" and they type in a "3" and some computer automatically adds three hours to the current time and gets 3:04.

At least, that's what I thought. I was asleep when the power came back on but various lights and sounds woke me up and according to my iPhone, it was 3:04. So maybe this was some kind of planned outage to do repair work. If that's what it was, they could have told us somehow. Seems to me the same computer that told me 3:04 on the phone when I called up and navigated through a lengthy maze of prompts could have sent out an e-mail or text to everyone who'd signed up for notices.

Anyway, I was asleep and as a few of you may remember — I haven't mentioned this in a long time here — I have sleep apnea so I doze with the aid of a CPAP unit. If you don't know what that is, this will explain it to you. If you do know what that is and use one, the following paragraphs may be of interest to you.

I have a couple of Auto CPAP machines, sometimes referred to as APAPs. My usual bedside one is an older but fine model but I recently purchased a new travel one which is unbelievably lightweight and it can also double as a backup for my bigger APAP device…and last night, did. It's the Z1 CPAP, made by these people. It's small, it weighs only 10 ounces, it's very quiet and — and this is how I was able to go to sleep last night before my power came back on — it can also run off a battery unit they sell.

That's a photo of it in the Powershell which you also need to purchase if you also buy the optional battery or batteries. They say that a fully-charged battery gives you a full night's sleep. I stayed with mine last night even after the electricity was working again and the battery ran out after six hours. That's more than a usual full night's sleep for me but you might need a second battery to swap out.  I believe I read that the higher your pressure, the faster your battery drains.

On my recent trips to Baltimore and New York, I threw caution to the wind and left the Powershell and batteries home so it's even smaller and lighter than what's in the picture. It works with any CPAP mask and — so far — does everything I ask of it. If you use a CPAP, browse the sites of companies that sell equipment and you might be surprised how cheap it is. But also note that with the Powershell and two batteries and a few extra supplies you might want, it could get costly. Maybe you have good insurance. Or maybe it's worth it to you to have a good machine that can get you through a night, sans electricity. Just thought I'd tell you about it.

Dark Blogging

Here I sit, blogging on my iPad because power in my neighborhood is out. There must be a way to blame this on Donald Trump.

I've spent way too much time today reading ‘n' thinking about the insensitivity of that phone call he placed to the woman who'd lost her husband in Niger. How could anybody say such a thing? I have me a theory…

Seems to me Mr. Trump prides himself on his gift o' gab…on his ability to wing it and talk his way outta any conversational corner. Sometimes, he does it via charm, sometimes by bullshittery, sometimes by pure unadulterated salesmanship…and don't tell me he isn't good at it. Look where he is today!

Winning the presidency has to have convinced him he's darn near infallible in this regard. At times, he knows so little about the topic at hand that he accepts the need to just read what's on a TelePrompter. But most of the time, someone tells him the message and he says "Got it!" and trusts his natural ability to connect with the listeners and get him through. It usually works.

But I'm guessing this time, he had close to zero knowledge and even less interest in phoning up a Gold Star Widow and trying to wax poetic and compassionate, so he turned to some aide he expects to know this stuff, asked what you say in these situations, and heard something like this…

I'm so sorry for your husband's sacrifice but I am in awe of his courage and heroism. All our fine fighting men are heroes because they volunteer for these jobs, knowing full well of the danger. Your husband was a hero the moment he placed helping others and defending his country ahead of any concern for his personal safety.

If Trump had said something like that, he would have been praised…but this is a man without a molecule of poetry in his soul. And being the kind of person who thinks in terms of business transactions and haggling, what he'd get from a briefing like that is "Knew the deal going in." And when he put that into Trumpspeak, it came out "knew what he signed up for." Which is what Trump would say if someone entered into a real estate deal and it didn't turn out well for the other guy. "Hey, it's your fault! You signed the deal!"

Because he's not the kind of guy who could ever understand that part about putting the helping of others and the well-being of the country ahead of your own interests.

And if you think I'm off-base on this: Well, maybe. Don't forget I'm writing this by flashlight.

Today's Video Link

I've featured a number of videos here of Barbershop Quartets and they were all male. Are there female Barbershop Quartets? Yes! Here's Sweet Lucy with a very familiar tune…

In Pursuit

There were two high-speed chases on Los Angeles TV yesterday — one in the afternoon, one in the evening. I think the evening one dragged my favorite reporter-in-the-sky Stu Mundel away from shooting aerial shots of celebrating Dodgers fans.

I find it hard to not watch these things when they're on live. Some of that is my fascination with live TV and what it's like when the folks shooting and transmitting something truly have no idea what's about to happen. You sometimes get that with reality shows and sporting events but reality shows are recorded and edited for broadcast, and with both kinds of shows, they have a pretty good idea of the different kinds of things that might happen. They just don't know which one.

That interests me and so does the plight of the poor reporter who has nothing to say but has to say something. I like Mr. Mundel because he usually finds something to say besides "This guy is driving with absolutely no regard for anyone else" or "This is an extremely dangerous situation." Lately, they always seem to say, "Police believe this driver is possibly armed." If someone is driving like crazy to get away from the cops, don't the cops always assume the driver is "possibly armed?" Why would they ever be even reasonably certain he was not? Hell, these days, they should probably assume that anyone over the age of six, driving or walking or just sitting on a bench is "possibly armed."

Like you, I sometimes wonder what's going on in the minds of these drivers who have nine cop cars behind them and a couple of choppers overhead…and still flee like they think there's a chance in a zillion of getting away. Like you, I usually decide there's nothing going on in those minds — nothing rational, anyway. I guess they just figure that if they can stay out of cops' clutches a little while longer, lightning may strike all eight of those sheriffs' cars or the police may run into someone else's car and be disabled…or something. They only seem to get away once in a very great while, usually when they can get a lead on their pursuers and then duck into a covered parking lot or somewhere the helicopter can't see. And even that doesn't work most of the time. Still, it's damn hard not to watch.

My Latest Tweet

  • If the Dodgers win a pennant without Vin Scully in the booth, does it make a noise?

My Latest Tweet

  • John Kelly: "I miss the days when women were held sacred." Which is why he serves a man who just holds them whether they like it or not.

Today's Video Link

Here's another number from a musical performed on a morning TV show. It's Norm Lewis and Carolee Carmello getting up way too early to perform "A Little Priest" from that intimate production of Sweeney Todd I've been praising on this blog — here, for instance. By the time I saw it, Mr. Lewis had been replaced by Hugh Panaro, who was very, very good and who played a Sweeney who seemed somewhat more mad and dangerous. Hope you like it…

VIDEO MISSING

Saying One Thing…

Matt Yglesias explains the problem Trump seems to be making for himself with this issue of phoning the families of U.S. servicemen killed in the line of duty. Seems to me the problem flows from the disconnect Trump seems to have between What He Says and What He Does. What He Says is what works for him at that very moment, regardless of reality.

You and I, being much better people, would never say "I have proof" of something unless we actually had it because we'd know it would make us look worse to then not be able to deliver it. Trump says he has proof of something because he's trying to nuke whoever he's arguing with and doesn't consider the ramifications of not being able to back that up.

Or let's say we were on the phone to the father of a fallen soldier who was bemoaning his financial situation. We might blurt out a promise to send him $25,000. We might even regret saying it five minutes later. But I think we'd then say, "Well, I said it. I have to do it. Might as well do it now." Trump says it and doesn't link that to the actual issuance of a check. That can come later if it proves to be necessary.

There are some obvious benefits to having your mind work like that. You're on the campaign trail. You want the votes of those who watch Fox News and have become convinced that there's nothing more horrible than Obamacare, what with it providing affordable health insurance to people in need. But you also want the votes of those who think it's a pretty good idea working pretty well…so what do you do? You promise to replace it with something better, something cheaper, something more efficient and wonderful, etc. That plays to both sides. What you don't do is ask yourself, "How the hell am I going to do that?" because in your mind, saying it and doing it are two separate, unrelated things.

I'm beginning to think that's one of the things his supporters like about the guy. It's certainly calming to think that when he says something that threatens to start World War III, that doesn't necessarily mean he's going to start World War III. And once you accept the premise that that's how he rolls, you can tell yourself your guy isn't lying. He's just not allowing his actions to be dictated by what he said he was going to do.

It's That Time Again…

…and that of course means time to start thinking about Comic-Con International in San Diego next year! It runs July 19-22 so it's only 273 days until Preview Night! And this message is to let you know that Returning Registration opens on Saturday, October 28 at 8:00 in the morning, PDT. The stuff you need to know about this is here.

Before that, we have WonderCon, which is March 23-25 at the Anaheim Convention Center. What you need to know about this is here.

And, very important: Do not rely on this blog for info on either con. If you're interested in attending one or both, keep your eye on this page. Thank you.

And While We're At It…

Here's a commercial for that production of Young Frankenstein with scenes from it. I have no financial interest in this show…

Today's Video Link (Not Counting The One I Posted Earlier)

Back here, I raved about a local production of Young Frankenstein that I saw last Saturday night. That company has now moved to the Cerritos Center for the Performing Arts for the next few weekends and you can get info and tickets here. And to further sell you locals on the idea of going, here's a brief, truncated number from the show as performed on Good Day L.A. by Dino Nicandros, who plays the title role, and Erik Scott Romney who plays Igor — or Eyegore, if you prefer…

Letterman in Semi-Retirement

Here's a profile of David Letterman in his current "What do I do now?" mode. He was also on with Jimmy Kimmel last night — a spot which mostly consisted of Jimmy fawning like the other late night Jimmy and Dave belittling Dave.

The article seemed awkward to me. Folks writing about Dave rarely seem able to avoid mentioning the Velcro suit and the Monkey-Cam, which were a long, long time ago and were of a style of comedy he abandoned. They were also bits that were funny largely because of the writers' ideas, not so much because of Dave. The evolution of his comedy was to move largely from things his staff devised to him just talking about his life…a trend I think he took too far. I remember my mother telling me she'd stopped watching because "That man makes millions of dollars a month and his audience worships him and all he does is complain."

He's still a brilliant, witty guy. I'm glad he has a new show coming on but I'm discouraged that the only announced guest so far is Howard Stern. It would be nice to see Letterman working in unexplored territory…and come to think of it, the same could be said about Stern. (Earlier this year when Trump started having those televised cabinet meetings where everyone has to talk about how great he is and what a fabulous job he's doing, they reminded me of something and it took me a while to figure out what. It was The Howard Stern Show. I kept expecting Trump to ask some lady to take off her top.)

This Sunday night, Letterman receives the Mark Twain Prize for Humor, which of course never goes to anyone who puts humor on paper the way Mark Twain did. The list of those saluting Dave is fairly predictable: Kimmel, Steve Martin, Martin Short, Bill Murray, etc. It doesn't air until November 20 so we'll have to wait 'til then to hear Dave tell us how he's not worthy. But he is. In fact, he's more worthy than about half of the people who already got this. Here's a montage of past ceremonies…

Your Wednesday Trump Dump

Trump is suddenly all about calling and sending out letters of condolence to the families of soldiers who died in the line of duty. He claims he did not say the insensitive thing he is supposed to have said to one widow and that he has proof. But of course, when Donald Trump claims to have proof of something, we never ever see it.

Eric Levitz says that even with a Republican House and Senate, it's looking like Trump's tax plan is not going to make it. Wasn't one of the selling points for his candidacy that he was this great deal-maker who could negotiate anything and everything and get things done?

It looks like the U.S. has just about won the war against ISIS by following the strategies laid out during the Obama administration. This presents a problem for Trump since he has to take credit for everything good, can't give any to his predecessor and can't point to anything he did differently. What's the answer? According to Kevin Drum, Trump has started claiming that ISIS gave up just because they knew Donald Trump was president. Right.

Remember when John McCain was a maverick who didn't automatically side with his own party? Then remember when he wanted to be president so he became something else? Well, Jonathan Chait thinks the old John McCain is back…and is offering serious opposition to his party's leader, D.J.T.

And lastly: Chait thinks that all of Trump's ranting about how Obamacare is dead and defunct is prelude to Trump getting a few fixes made to it, rebranding it (maybe even as Trumpcare) and declaring it the cheaper, better health care plan that he promised everyone. You know, just like the wall he promised has turned into other, more possible variations.